"Monday morning, a week ago Monday morning."

Reardon noted her response down in his notebook. Everything she had said so far, he thought, had been in the newspapers. "Do you have any idea when on Monday morning you were in the Children"s Zoo?" Point by point he expected the credibility of her story to disintegrate. "Had the sun come up, do you remember? Was it after dawn?"

"No," she replied firmly. "It was not. It was still very dark. I am sure of that."

"I see," Reardon said.

"It was very dark," Mrs. La.s.siter repeated, "except, of course, for the lights that illuminate the zoo at night."

"Of course," Reardon said, looking up. "So you were in the Children"s Zoo early Monday morning, before daylight. Were you alone?"

"Yes."

"You were alone in the Children"s Zoo at that hour?" Reardon asked again, and it was clear that he doubted it.

"Yes," Mrs. La.s.siter said authoritatively, "I was."

"Why?"

Mrs. La.s.siter did not answer.

"It"s kind of unusual," Reardon said, "for anyone to be in the park at that hour."

"Yes," Mrs. La.s.siter said, looking away, "I suppose it is."

"Could you tell me why you were there?"

"That is very personal," Mrs. La.s.siter said.

"If it has no bearing on the case," Reardon a.s.sured her, "then anything you say is confidential. I promise you."

Mrs. La.s.siter bowed her head. "I don"t know if I can," she said.

Reardon leaned toward her. "Mrs. La.s.siter, I have been a policeman in New York for about thirty years."

Mrs. La.s.siter looked up and smiled. "I suppose you have heard or seen every possible wickedness?"

"Yes, I think so," Reardon said.

Mrs. La.s.siter"s face relaxed but her lower lip began to tremble. "Have you ever been in great pain?" she asked.

"Physical pain?" Reardon asked. "No. No, I haven"t."

"Look at my hands," Mrs. La.s.siter said.

Reardon looked down at Mrs. La.s.siter"s hands. They were curled delicately around the arms of her chair. He could guess what they looked like under the gloves.

"I cannot straighten my fingers," she said. "There are days when I cannot move at all because the pain is too great. There are days when I cannot raise a fork to my lips to feed myself, and so I have to be fed and my mouth has to be wiped like an infant."

"I see," Reardon said. He could feel a tension building in his own hands, tightening his fingers.

"Do you?" Mrs. La.s.siter asked. "I don"t think you do."

"It"s your arthritis?" Reardon asked.

"Yes," Mrs. La.s.siter said, and she stared at him with a face as full of rage at the awesome humiliation of her distress as Reardon had ever seen. "There are times when I can do no more for myself than the tiniest infant. Times when I cannot clean myself."

Reardon leaned back in his chair and tried to relax the rage he felt might rise in him at any moment. He wanted to lift her up, fold her in gossamer, and send her to the place where earthbound things have wings. But he could not even speak.

Mrs. La.s.siter was silent for a moment. She sat, lips trembling, trying to compose herself. "But that does not really tell you what I was doing in the Children"s Zoo before dawn on a Monday morning," she said finally.

"No," Reardon admitted, "it doesn"t."

"I don"t want to live like this," Mrs. La.s.siter said.

Reardon nodded. He felt helpless, unable to do anything else.

"Are you a Catholic, Detective Reardon?" she asked.

"In a way."

"An apostate?"

"In a way," Reardon said again.

"But you are enough of a Catholic to know that in our faith suicide is a mortal sin?"

"Yes."

"All my life," Mrs. La.s.siter said, "I have been a devout Catholic."

Reardon nodded.

"A practicing Catholic," Mrs. La.s.siter added.

"Yes," Reardon said.

For a moment Mrs. La.s.siter could not speak.

Reardon waited, then he urged her on. "A practicing Catholic," he said.

"Yes," Mrs. La.s.siter said, "a devout and practicing Catholic who cannot bear to live anymore."

"I see," Reardon said.

"Have you ever heard the story of David and Uriah?" Mrs. La.s.siter said.

"No."

"King David in the Bible? And Uriah?"

"No."

"Well, Uriah was a soldier in the army of Israel. He had a beautiful wife, and David wanted her for himself. But David did not believe in adultery. And he did not believe in outright murder. So he sent Uriah to the most deadly position in a battle, and Uriah was killed there."

Mrs. La.s.siter looked at Reardon. "Do you know what I mean?"

"I"m not sure," Reardon said.

"I am David," Mrs. La.s.siter said.

"David?"

"And Uriah," she added.

Then Reardon understood why Mrs. La.s.siter had been in the Children"s Zoo so early on a Monday morning. But he did not know what he could say or do in response to that knowledge. Quickly he leaned forward and picked a dead leaf from Mrs. La.s.siter"s lap and dropped it soundlessly into the pool beside her.

"I want to die but I cannot kill myself," Mrs. La.s.siter said, "so I go to dangerous secluded places."

It seemed to Reardon that a wave of relief pa.s.sed over her with that final, direct admission. "Like the Children"s Zoo?" he asked.

"Yes."

"I"m sorry."

"Thank you," Mrs. La.s.siter said.

Reardon noted how quickly she had regained her composure. It was obvious to him that she neither needed nor wanted pity; what she wanted was to die, to be done with it. In the meantime she would carry on as best she could.

"You may continue your questions, Detective Reardon," she said.

"Why don"t you just tell me what you saw?" Reardon said, exhausted.

Mrs. La.s.siter nodded politely. "I was walking down the sidewalk which runs near the elephant cages and into the plaza behind the main building, the one at the Fifth Avenue entrance to the zoo. I had been walking all about the park that evening. I had not seen many people. As I said, I am not sure of the time."

"Yes, go on."

"Well, as I reached the southern corner of the main building, I saw a man running toward me with an ax in his hand. He was covered with blood. He was looking behind him as he ran, and it was not until he was almost on me, not more than a few feet away, that he turned forward and saw me."

"And you saw him?" Reardon asked.

"Very clearly," Mrs. La.s.siter said, "and I have never seen a face so full of fear. I thought for a moment that he must have been attacked himself. The way he looked so frightened, the way he was running, looking behind him."

"What did he do when he saw you?"

"He stopped. And he just looked at me," Mrs. La.s.siter said. "I thought he was going to collapse at my feet and beg me to protect him. He was weeping, you see. Crying so hard that his whole body was shaking."

"Crying?"

"Oh, yes," Mrs. La.s.siter said, "very definitely. I have no doubt of that. He was crying, almost convulsively. We were standing on the sidewalk. It was well lit, and I saw him as plainly as I could see you in this garden if you were a few feet distant. Then he turned and ran in the other direction."

"Which direction?"

"He ran directly north, away from me. Then he turned and disappeared behind the main building. Toward the stairs that exit the park onto Fifth Avenue."

Reardon jotted this down in his notebook. "What did he do with the ax?"

"He took it with him."

"You"re sure he didn"t drop it or throw it away?"

"No," Mrs. La.s.siter said, "he took it with him. He still had it when he ran out of sight."

"I see," Reardon said. He took a photograph of Andros Petrakis from his coat pocket and handed it to Mrs. La.s.siter. "Is this the man you saw?"

Mrs. La.s.siter took the photograph and examined it. Then she looked up at Reardon and smiled. "You detectives are so curious," she said.

Reardon was puzzled. "What do you mean?"

"This photo. I suppose you have to do these things."

"What things?"

"Tests, I suppose you would call them. I mean the way you give me a photograph of a man I have never seen before in my life and leave a picture of the real man sitting right in front of me."

"What?"

"The newspaper," Mrs. La.s.siter said.

Reardon glanced down at the newspaper and the three pictures of the Van Allen family. "One of them?" he asked.

"Why, yes," Mrs. La.s.siter replied, puzzled by Reardon"s apparent surprise.

"Which one?" Reardon asked quietly.

Laboriously Mrs. La.s.siter raised her arm and pointed toward the faces staring back at her from the newspaper. "Him," she said.

"Wallace Van Allen?"

"The second one down."

Reardon put his index finger on the face of Dwight Van Allen. "Him?"

"Yes," Mrs. La.s.siter said.

"Are you sure?"

"Yes."