After tea most of us collected about Watty"s veranda. Most things that happened in Bourke happened at Watty"s pub, or near it.

If a horse bolted with a buggy or cart, he was generally stopped outside Watty"s, which seemed to suggest, as Mitch.e.l.l said, that most of the heroes drank at Watty"s--also that the pluckiest men were found amongst the hardest drinkers. (But sometimes the horse fetched up against Watty"s sign and lamppost--which was a stout one of "iron-bark"--and smashed the trap.) Then Watty"s was the Carriers" Arms, a union pub; and Australian teamsters are mostly hard cases: while there was something in Watty"s beer which made men argue fluently, and the best fights came off in his backyard. Watty"s dogs were the most quarrelsome in town, and there was a dog-fight there every other evening, followed as often as not by a man-fight. If a bushman"s horse ran away with him the chances were that he"d be thrown on to Watty"s veranda, if he wasn"t pitched into the bar; and victims of accidents, and sick, hard-up shearers, were generally carried to Watty"s pub, as being the most convenient and comfortable for them. Mitch.e.l.l denied that it was generosity or good nature on Watty"s part, he said it was all business--advertis.e.m.e.nt.

Watty knew what he was doing. He was very deep, was Watty. Mitch.e.l.l further hinted that if he was sick _he_ wouldn"t be carried to Watty"s, for Watty knew what a thirsty business a funeral was. Tom Hall reckoned that Watty bribed the Army on the quiet.

I was sitting on a stool along the veranda wall with Donald Macdonald, Bob Brothers (the Giraffe) and Mitch.e.l.l, and one or two others, and Jack Moonlight sat on the floor with his back to the wall and his hat well down over his eyes. The Army came along at the usual time, but we didn"t see the Pretty Girl at first--she was a bit late. Mitch.e.l.l said he liked to be at Watty"s when the Army prayed and the Pretty Girl was there; he had no objection to being prayed for by a girl like that, though he reckoned that nothing short of a real angel could save him now. He said his old grandmother used to pray for him every night of her life and three times on Sunday, with Christmas Day extra when Christmas Day didn"t fall on a Sunday; but Mitch.e.l.l reckoned that the old lady couldn"t have had much influence because he became more sinful every year, and went deeper in ways of darkness, until finally he embarked on a career of crime.

The Army prayed, and then a thin "ratty" little woman bobbed up in the ring; she"d gone mad on religion as women do on woman"s rights and hundreds of other things. She was so skinny in the face, her jaws so prominent, and her mouth so wide, that when she opened it to speak it was like a ventriloquist"s dummy and you could almost see the cracks open down under her ears.

"They say I"m cracked!" she screamed in a shrill, cracked voice. "But I"m not cracked--I"m only cracked on the Lord Jesus Christ! That"s all I"m cracked on----." And just then the Amen man of the Army--the Army groaner we called him, who was always putting both feet in it--just then he blundered forward, rolled up his eyes, threw his hands up and down as if he were bouncing two b.a.l.l.s, and said, with deep feeling:

"Thank the Lord she"s got a crack in the right place!"

Tom Hall doubled up, and most of the other sinners seemed to think there was something very funny about it. And the Army, too, seemed struck with an idea that there was something wrong somewhere, for they started a hymn.

A big American negro, who"d been a night watchman in Sydney, stepped into the ring and waved his arms and kept time, and as he got excited he moved his hands up and down rapidly, as if he was hauling down a rope in a great hurry through a pulley block above, and he kept saying, "Come down, Lord!" all through the hymn, like a ba.s.s accompaniment, "Come down, Lord; come down, Lord; come down, Lord; come down, Lord!" and the quicker be said it the faster he hauled. He was as good as a drum. And, when the hymn was over, he started to testify.

"My frens!" he said, "I was once black as der coals in der mined! I was once black as der ink in der ocean of sin! But now--thank an" bless the Lord!--I am whiter dan der dribben snow!"

Tom Hall sat down on the edge of the veranda and leaned his head against a post and cried. He had contributed a bob this evening, and he was getting his money"s worth.

Then the Pretty Girl arrived and was pushed forward into the ring.

She looked thinner and whiter than I"d ever seen her, and there was a feverish brightness in her eyes that I didn"t like.

"Men!" she said, "this is Christmas Day-." I didn"t hear any more for, at the sound of her voice, Jack Moonlight jumped up as if he"d sat on a baby. He started forward, stared at her for a moment as if he couldn"t believe his eyes, and then said, "Hannah!" short and sharp. She started as if she was shot, gave him a wild look, and stumbled forward; the next moment he had her in his arms and was steering for the private parlour.

I heard Mrs Bothways calling for water and smelling-salts; she was as fat as Watty, and very much like him in the face, but she was emotional and sympathetic. Then presently I heard, through the open window, the Pretty Girl say to Jack, "Oh, Jack, Jack! Why did you go away and leave me like that? It was cruel!"

"But you told me to go, Hannah," said Jack.

"That-that didn"t make any difference. Why didn"t you write?" she sobbed.

"Because you never wrote to me, Hannah," he said.

"That--that was no excuse!" she said. "It was so k-k-k-cruel of you, Jack."

Mrs Bothways pulled down the window. A new-comer asked Watty what the trouble was, and he said that the Army girl had only found her chap, or husband, or long-lost brother or something, but the missus was looking after the business; then he dozed again.

And then we adjourned to the Royal and took the Army with us.

"That"s the way of it," said Donald Macdonald. "With a woman it"s love or religion; with a man it"s love or the devil."

"Or with a man," said Mitch.e.l.l, presently, "it"s love and the devil both, sometimes, Donald."

I looked at Mitch.e.l.l hard, but for all his face expressed he might only have said, "I think it"s going to rain."

"LORD DOUGLAS"

They hold him true, who"s true to one, However false he be.

-The Rouseabout of Rouseabouts.

The Imperial Hotel was rather an unfortunate name for an out-back town pub, for out back is the stronghold of Australian democracy; it was the out-back vote and influence that brought about "One Man One Vote,"

"Payment of Members," and most of the democratic legislation of late years, and from out back came the overwhelming vote in favour of Australian as Imperial Federation.

The name Royal Hotel is as familiar as that of the Railway Hotel, and pa.s.ses unnoticed and ungrowled at, even by bush republicans. The Royal Hotel at Bourke was kept by an Irishman, one O"Donohoo, who was Union to the backbone, loudly in favour of "Australia for the Australians," and, of course, against even the democratic New South Wales Government of the time. He went round town all one St Patrick"s morning with a bunch of green ribbon fastened to his coat-tail with a large fish-hook, and wasn"t aware of the fact till he sat down on the point of it. But that"s got nothing to do with it.

The Imperial Hotel at Bourke was unpopular from the first. It was said that the very existence of the house was the result of a swindle. It had been built with money borrowed on certain allotments in the centre of the town and on the understanding that it should be built on the mortgaged land, whereas it was erected on a free allotment. Which fact was discovered, greatly to its surprise, by the building society when it came to foreclose on the allotments some years later. While the building was being erected the Bourke people understood, in a vague way, that it was to be a convent (perhaps the building society thought so, too), and when certain ornaments in brick and cement in the shape of a bishop"s mitre were placed over the corners of the walls the question seemed decided. But when the place was finished a bar was fitted up, and up went the sign, to the disgust of the other publicans, who didn"t know a licence had been taken out--for licensing didn"t go by local option in those days. It was rumoured that the place belonged to, and the whole business was engineered by, a priest. And priests are men of the world.

The Imperial Hotel was patronized by the pastoralists, the civil servants, the bank manager and clerks--all the scrub aristocracy; it was the headquarters of the Pastoralists" Union in Bourke; a barracks for blacklegs brought up from Sydney to take the place of Union shearers on strike; and the new Governor, on his inevitable visit to Bourke, was banqueted at the Imperial Hotel. The editor of the local "capitalistic rag" stayed there; the pastoralists" member was elected mostly by dark ways and means devised at the Imperial Hotel, and one of its managers had stood as a dummy candidate to split the Labour vote; the management of the hotel was his reward. In short, it was there that most of the plots were hatched to circ.u.mvent Freedom, and put away or deliver into the clutches of law and order certain sons of Light and Liberty who believed in converting blacklegs into jellies by force of fists when bribes, gentle persuasion and pure Australian language failed to convert them to clean Unionism. The Imperial Hotel was called the "Squatters"

Pub," the "Scabbery," and other and more expressive names.

The hotel became still more unpopular after Percy Douglas had managed it for a while. He was an avowed enemy of Labour Unionists. He employed Chinese cooks, and that in the height of the anti-Chinese agitation in Australia, and he was known to have kindly feelings towards the Afghans who, with their camels, were running white carriers off the roads. If an excited Unionist called a man a "blackleg" or "scab" in the Imperial bar he was run out--sometimes with great difficulty, and occasionally as far as the lock-up.

Percy Douglas was a fine-looking man, "wid a chest on him an" well hung--a fine fee-_gure_ of a man," as O"Donohoo p.r.o.nounced it. He was tall and erect, he dressed well, wore small side-whiskers, had an eagle nose, and looked like an aristocrat. Like many of his type, who start sometimes as billiard-markers and suddenly become hotel managers in Australia, nothing was known of his past. Jack Mitch.e.l.l reckoned, by the way he treated his employees and spoke to workmen, that he was the educated son of an English farmer--gone wrong and sent out to Australia.

Someone called him "Lord Douglas," and the nickname caught on.

He made himself well hated. He got One-eyed Bogan "three months" hard"

for taking a bottle of whisky off the Imperial bar counter because he (Bogan) was drunk and thirsty and had knocked down his cheque, and because there was no one minding the bar at the moment.

Lord Douglas dismissed the barmaid, and, as she was leaving, he had her boxes searched and gave her in charge for stealing certain articles belonging to the hotel. The chaps subscribed to defend the case, and subsequently put a few pounds together for the girl. She proved her grat.i.tude by bringing a charge of a baby against one of the chaps--but that was only one of the little ways of the world, as Mitch.e.l.l said. She joined a Chinese camp later on.

Lord Douglas employed a carpenter to do some work about the hotel, and because the carpenter left before the job was finished, Lord Douglas locked his tools in an outhouse and refused to give them up; and when the carpenter, with the spirit of an Australian workman, broke the padlock and removed his tool-chest, the landlord gave him in charge for breaking and entering. The chaps defended the case and won it, and hated Lord Douglas as much as if he were their elder brother. Mitch.e.l.l was the only one to put in a word for him.

"I"ve been puzzling it out," said Mitch.e.l.l, as he sat nursing his best leg in the Union Office, "and, as far as I can see, it all amounts to this--we"re all mistaken in Lord Douglas. We don"t know the man.

He"s all right. We don"t understand him. He"s really a sensitive, good-hearted man who"s been shoved a bit off the track by the world.

It"s the world"s fault--he"s not to blame. You see, when he was a youngster he was the most good-natured kid in the school; he was always soft, and, consequently, he was always being imposed upon, and bullied, and knocked about. Whenever he got a penny to buy lollies he"d count "em out carefully and divide "em round amongst his schoolmates and brothers and sisters. He was the only one that worked at home, and consequently they all hated him. His father respected him, but didn"t love him, because he wasn"t a younger son, and wasn"t bringing his father"s grey hairs down in sorrow to the grave. If it was in Australia, probably Lord Douglas was an elder son and had to do all the hard graft, and teach himself at night, and sleep in a bark skillion while his younger brothers benefited--they were born in the new brick house and went to boarding-schools. His mother had a contempt for him because he wasn"t a black sheep and a prodigal, and, when the old man died, the rest of the family got all the stuff and Lord Douglas was kicked out because they could do without him now. And the family hated him like poison ever afterwards (especially his mother), and spread lies about him--because they had treated him shamefully and because his mouth was shut--they knew he wouldn"t speak. Then probably he went in for Democracy and worked for Freedom, till Freedom trod on him once too often with her hob-nailed boots. Then the chances are, in the end, he was ruined by a girl or woman, and driven, against his will, to take refuge in pure individualism. He"s all right, only we don"t appreciate him. He"s only fighting against his old ideals--his old self that comes up sometimes--and that"s what makes him sweat his barmaids and servants, and hate us, and run us in; and perhaps when he cuts up extra rough it"s because his conscience kicks him when he thinks of the d.a.m.ned soft fool he used to be. He"s all right--take my word for it. It"s all a mask.

Why, he might be one of the kindest-hearted men in Bourke underneath."

Tom Hall rubbed his head and blinked, as if he was worried by an idea that there might be some facts in Mitch.e.l.l"s theories.

"You"re allers findin" excuses for blacklegs an" scabs, Mitch.e.l.l," said Barcoo-Rot, who took Mitch.e.l.l seriously (and who would have taken a laughing jacka.s.s seriously). "Why, you"d find a white spot on a squatter. I wouldn"t be surprised if you blacklegged yourself in the end."

This was an unpardonable insult, from a Union point of view, and the chaps half-unconsciously made room on the floor for Barcoo-Rot to fall after Jack Mitch.e.l.l hit him. But Mitch.e.l.l took the insult philosophically.

"Well, Barcoo-Rot," he said, nursing the other leg, "for the matter of that, I did find a white spot on a squatter once. He lent me a quid when I was hard up. There"s white spots on the blackest characters if you only drop prejudice and look close enough. I suppose even Jack-the-Ripper"s character was speckled. Why, I can even see spots on your character, sometimes, Barcoo-Rot. I"ve known white spots to spread on chaps" characters until they were little short of saints. Sometimes I even fancy I can feel my own wings sprouting. And as for turning blackleg--well, I suppose I"ve got a bit of the crawler in my composition (most of us have), and a man never knows what might happen to his principles."

"Well," said Barcoo-Rot, "I beg yer pardon--ain"t that enough?"

"No," said Mitch.e.l.l, "you ought to wear a three-bushel bag and ashes for three months, and drink water; but since the police would send you to an asylum if you did that, I think the best thing we can do is to go out and have a drink."

Lord Douglas married an Australian girl somewhere, somehow, and brought her to Bourke, and there were two little girls--regular little fairies.

She was a gentle, kind-hearted little woman, but she didn"t seem to improve him much, save that he was very good to her.

"It"s mostly that way," commented Mitch.e.l.l. "When a boss gets married and has children he thinks he"s got a greater right to grind his fellowmen and rob their wives and children. I"d never work for a boss with a big family--it"s hard enough to keep a single boss nowadays in this country."