Book 4: Chapter 57: The Ship In The Distance

Thick carpets of dark clouds blanketed the skies over Lake Biwa, shadowing the distant mountains in a sheet of gray.

It seemed it could rain at any moment.

Shimizu opened the cabin window, allowing the lake’s refreshing breeze mixed with the foreboding smell of rain to seep in.

“Lily, do you like the rain?” Shimizu asked while looking through the window, observing the overcast weather.

“I naturally like it,” Lily got up and neared the other window, “I always feel that the rain here, along with the beautiful trees, flowers, mountains, and rivers, even those in remote corners, exude an undertone of bliss.”

Lil’ Lily, you have a keen sense for nature, but why are you so oblivious to the matters of the heart? Shimizu’s eyes weighed heavily with depression, and her trembling lashes fluttered slightly amidst the whispering wind.

“Ah, did I do something?” Lily thought her sister was still hurt over the previous incident.

“No, I’m fine. Say…aren’t you lonely?” Shimizu asked with a tinge of blush.

“…”

This question jolted Lily’s heart, but even if she had an answer, she couldn’t reply.

“Sis Lily, after we parted ways at Mt. Yoshino, I walked the path of solitude for the first time. Though I had the power to venture alone without fear of demons, I realized that I was lonely in this vast world. I lost my goals, lost my compet.i.tive spirit, and betrayed the disciplines of what it meant to be a samurai. You can’t imagine the suffocating loneliness and helplessness of facing a strange world…” Shimizu’s voice carried a sense of loss.

These words evoked mixed feelings in Lily, “How can Sister Shimizu be so sure that I don’t understand the helplessness of a person facing an unfamiliar world?”

Shimizu turned to face Lily, “Sis, you’ve never told me about your past. Where were you before you came to Kamakura? Where are your parents and relatives?”

“…”

Lily didn’t know what to say. She didn’t want to deceive Shimizu, but she came from another world. What sense did it make to try and explain something that even she herself didn’t understand?

“Sister Shimizu, I don’t really remember. I woke up on the streets of Kamakura with only a sakura parasol and the ancient mirror. After that, I traveled all the way to Takes.h.i.ta Town.”

“Really…so my dear sister has been alone all this time? Then who is it that you’re so attached to?” Shimizu studied the cloud patterns in the sky.

Lily found no reason to conceal her feelings. After all, this was her close sister who shared life and death with her. But there was no clear way to explain the matter regarding her Senior Sister.

“Sister Shimizu, I…”

“Did you fall in love with Uesugi Rei?” Shimizu’s eyes blurred but her mind held firm. Although the two of them would be alone for more than ten days, it wasn’t enough time for her to conquer Lily’s heart.

When they arrive in the Heian Region, elegant and graceful young ladies would be strewn about everywhere. It also didn’t help that relationships between girls were prevalent there, making it hard to guarantee that Lily wouldn’t be swayed by the dazzling flowers.

Shimizu was determined to ask the decisive question: whether Lily liked men or just wasn’t into her at all. No matter the answer, she would accept it and settle for staying by Lily’s side to silently protect her. Regardless of anything, Shimizu still bore some semblance of hope. A lot of evidence such as Lily’s subtle expressions opposed those negative conclusions.

Shimizu’s direct question caught Lily off guard. It was just like her— always asking the most critical questions that gave little room to maneuver.

Lily barely knew the answer herself, much less giving a clear answer to another person.

“I…” She stammered for a while but eventually spoke, “Lily can only love one woman in this life, but it’s not Uesugi Rei.”

“Then who is she?” Shimizu had long wondered about this question. Based on her observations, Lily seemed to like Uesugi yet still resisted her advances.

Lily didn’t know how to tackle this problem. During their time together, they had many misunderstandings but developed a deep bond because of them. Her Sister Shimizu was even endangering her life to protect and accompany her. Except for the extraordinary parts, what qualifications did she have to hide the truth?

Lily maintained eye contact and confessed sincerely, “The one I love is Senior Sister.”

After opening up, she felt light and a lot more relaxed.

This is the weight of my loneliness and desperation that burdened my heart for a long time. I didn’t come to the Heian Dynasty to live, but to seize the iron village and steal the ancient jade— something ordinary people wouldn’t have the guts to do. This desperation is the source of my courage which empowers my obsession and strength. It’s all for my Senior Sister.

But today, she got the chance to share her heavy secret with someone she could trust wholeheartedly; someone more mature than herself, but also more naive.

“Senior Sister?” Shimizu’s obvious puzzlement hid a deep sadness. She could see the undisguised obsession in Lily’s eyes— a look she had never seen before.

Stellar women like Lily were always surrounded by numerous girls, getting teased and coaxed at every corner. However, this could also be attributed to Lily’s own ambiguous and half-hearted att.i.tude which left many irritated. Of course, the same att.i.tude was shown toward Shimizu. But for this Senior Sister, the difference was as evident as night and day.

The reality hurt.

“Who is Senior Sister? She should be a woman, but what does Senior Sister mean? Is it her name?” She wanted to know more about the woman that managed to steal Lily’s heart.

“Senior Sister is an appellation, just like how you’d address the senior female students at Kamakura’s inst.i.tute of learning, but in Lily’s mind, Senior Sister is an appellation that belongs to that person,” Lily said after thinking for a moment. Remembering her Senior Sister who was still sleeping within the mirror s.p.a.ce’s dark stone room, her eyes moistened.

Pain stung at Shimizu’s heart as she watched Lily’s expressions. Why did Lily care about this woman so much?!

Her eyes drifted to an inconspicuous corner of the room, “Then where is your Senior Sister now? Why have you never mentioned her, and never went out to find her?”

This question soured Lily’s mood, “It’s not that I didn’t want to see her, but I don’t know where she is. I have no idea how to reach her…”

Lily left out the bits about her senior’s soul because she didn’t want to risk her safety and recovery. She wouldn’t tell anyone about this particular secret.

Lily’s absolute trust in Shimizu wasn’t a lie, but secrets could only be called secrets when they were kept to oneself. Disclosing secrets always bore the risk of them being spread— something she would rather avoid.

However, if it was just revealing that such a person existed, there was no problem.

Hearing this, Shimizu seemed to have understood something, Sis Lily is now the top female samurai in Kamakura, but even she doesn’t have any clues about her Senior Sister’s whereabouts. It’s hard to tell if she’s even alive. It’s no wonder why Lily is so obsessed.

Shimizu felt a bit powerless in this situation. The lady in Lily’s memories was a G.o.ddess-like existence perfected by her mind. How could she compete against someone who only existed in memory?

But can memories kiss Lil’ Lily; can they satisfy her physical and emotional needs? If I play my cards right, I still have a chance1.

“Then what is the relationship between you and your Senior Sister? Are you a couple?”

“Ah, this…” Lily thought back to her Senior Sister’s last-minute confession. Apparently, both of them harbored a secret crush for each other. In a sense, they could be considered a couple, but they never dated or nurtured feelings like regular couples.

“I’m not sure…” Lily stared outside the window with a lost look, her long hair swaying lightly in the wind.

“How do I ask this…? So in other words, you weren’t an official couple yet, right?” Shimizu approached and slid her slender fingers between Lily’s own.

Just this small touch caused Lily’s heart to tremble. She reprimanded herself for being so weak in this regard but was helpless in the end.

“I…I don’t know. Please don’t ask anymore,” Lily blushed.

“Mhm,” Shimizu switched to another question, “So, how long have you not seen each other?”

“Uhm…” She pondered for a while, “I think a little over half a year.”

“You haven’t seen your Senior Sister for half a year, and you also don’t know where she is. Did you know her from before you lost your memory?” Shimizu’s eyes shone with intelligence.

“Yes.” “Lil’ Lily, don’t you believe in your sister?” “Why does sister ask that?”

“Does this Senior Sister of yours really exist in this world, or is she just your fantasy? Since it was before you lost your memory, why do you remember? Are you planning to lie to me again? I’ve decided not to hate you if you lie, but I’ll definitely punish you!” Shimizu warned and pulled Lily closer to her side.

“No, it’s not a lie. Sister, can you not punish me, please? Will you listen to me?”

Shimizu knew that there was more to the story. They had time so she didn’t push Lily too much. She smiled calmly, “Okay, let’s talk about it. Sister won’t punish you immediately and will listen to your explanation first.”

Lily’s face flushed even more, not only because of the shame of possible punishment but also because she was continuing to lie. When she told a lie, she had to cover it up with more lies, even if they had some truths mixed in.

How could she make Shimizu believe her flawed explanation? She wasn’t afraid of the punishment because of pain or shame, but afraid that she’d get lost in the mood and submit to Shimizu.

“Okay, listen to me…”

At around this time, a boat curtained by the thick fog tailed behind Lily’s ship while maintaining several kilometers of distance. The drifting mist and dark weather provided the perfect cover for the suspicious ship. Two figures exited its cabin and stood at the bow, gazing in the general direction of their target. “Lord Tamurakonoe, when shall we start?” Kiuchidera squinted at the vast expanse of clouds, his robe flapping in the oncoming wind. “Haha, there will be a storm tonight,” Tamurakonoe laughed.

1. Robinxen: This woman is something else I tell you.