Evil God Average

Chapter 63

I have a bad habit of forgetting I’m meant to do something the moment the relevant Firefox tab closes.

Part 2 – The Evil G.o.d Statue Has Activated!

-clang clang clang-

The sound of nails being hammered, rang out through the vicinity.
Horizontal poles were being affixed atop stakes that stood at even intervals.
It was the fence being built around the Evil G.o.d Statue.

“Heeey! Bring that stake to your right a bit more.”

“Here?”

“That’s left.”

“So you mean your right!?”

I’m watching over the construction of the fence from where I’m sitting at the feet of the Evil G.o.d Statue.
I just thought that I should make sure everything goes right.

At first I was sitting on the pedestal it stood on, but it was a little bit too high for my feet to reach the ground, so I moved here instead.
Sitting on its toes brings me to just the right height for my feet to touch the pedestal.
To be honest, I think I should be helping out with something, but I would just be underestimating it and getting in the way. Not only that, the Pope told me to just sit and watch too, so that’s why I’m contenting myself to observation.

Yup. Observation.
I’m definitely not just s.p.a.cing out, okay?
Although I’m really just sitting here, not even saying anything.

Anyway, with this fence in place, at least people won’t be able to look up its skirt. Since that’s the case, I’ll just bear with people praying to it.
To be honest, it’s still really embarra.s.sing, which is why I didn’t want it built in the first place, but there’s not much I can do about it now short of destroying it.

“Phew. I guess we’re about ninety percent done?”

“Sounds about right. Just a little more to go.”

“Alright. Let’s finish the last bit in one go.”

“Yeah.”

But man. What great weather.
The sunlight is warm. There’s a gentle breeze. It’s just all so nice that I’m getting kinda sleep-… Whoa, not good, not good. I almost dozed off.
Even if I’m not doing anything, it’d still be rude to sleep in front of people labouring away.
But telling me not to take an afternoon nap on such a nice day feels basically like torture.

Listening to the rhythmic hammering made me sleepy again.
And a voice began to whisper in my head that n.o.body would know even if I slept with this mask on.

A vicious battle between willpower and sleepiness unfolded in my mind.

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『Evil G.o.d Statue has been granted divine protection.』

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The sudden voice caused me to awaken with a start.

…Oh c.r.a.p… I’ve really done it now…
Because of the time that pa.s.sed as I slept, apparently I went and invoked my divine enchantment skill.

When I looked up, I found a dark cloud enveloping the giant statue.
I decided to evacuate from my position before the darkness reached its feet too.

“? Oi, what the heck is…?”

“Mn? Wha-, oi, oi.”

“There’s something black around the statue of Anri-sama…”

“What the heck is…?”

Perhaps they noticed something was wrong because the labourers all stopped their work to look up.
And while all of them gazed at the statue, the shadow began to fade away.
And when it vanished, what remained was the same Evil G.o.d Statue as before. The only difference was that it was now jet black.
And also, looking carefully, there was now an “S” shape carved into its forehead, just like on Tena’s head.
But well, there didn’t seem to be anything too different?

No, no, I can’t let my guard down.

Considering my past experiences with this skill, it wouldn’t be strange even if it had some new effect of spreading miasma, or scaring people witless just by looking at it.

After I came to that conclusion, I turned to look at the workers.
But although they were all standing still, there didn’t seem to be anything wrong with them.

Was it just a needless worry? …Just as I breathed a sigh of relief, my vision suddenly went dark.

“………?”

But when I looked more carefully, the area a bit further away was sunny as usual.

“………???”

Wondering what was up, I looked up again to find a giant clump of metal slowly… SWINGING TOWARDS ME!? UWAH!?

Diving to the side in panic, I managed to escape the clump by a hair’s breadth.
No sooner had I done so, that metal lump… or rather, the Evil G.o.d Statue’s right foot, came rumbling down on the pedestal. It happened so violently that cracks ran through it like a spiderweb.

Oh c.r.a.p, oh c.r.a.p. I almost got turned into a pancake.

But the situation didn’t end there.
This time it was the left leg that rose up, and stepped down onto the ground itself. The whole thing was so heavy that even the metal pedestal was cracked, so this time the foot sank into the ground and caused a tremor to spread beneath our feet.

“………You’re kidding.”

With my b.u.t.t still on the pedestal, I looked up in a daze at the giant me statue and finally understood what was going on.

That ma.s.sive Evil G.o.d Statue (E.G.S.) had started to walk.

The situation had far exceeded just a statue that caused fear or miasma. What was happening was just way too insane.
But unfortunately it didn’t stop at just two steps, and continued walking ahead.

“R-, RUN FOR IT!”

“WHAT THE h.e.l.l IS GOING ON!?”

“JUST RUN! YOU’LL GET SQUASHED!”

“UWAAHHHHHHHH!?”

I’m not sure if they understood what was happening, but the frozen workers all dashed away madly.
Only a few seconds later, one corner of the fence had been crushed flat by the E.G.S..
Having said that though, it didn’t seem to be doing it on purpose, and all this was probably just a result of it trying to move forward.
The reason I almost got crushed earlier was probably just because I was standing on the pedestal.

As for how on earth it was moving, I still had no idea. The only visible change was its colour, so it shouldn’t have had any joints.
But that wasn’t even my biggest concern.
The biggest concern was obviously that a ma.s.sive statue the height of a five story temple was walking about.

And walking without stopping at all.

At this rate, this thing was going to walk right out of the country. And I couldn’t even imagine much trouble I’d be in if that happened.
But I didn’t have any way to stop it either.

“OOH!? Anri-sama! Where are you going!?”

Nowhere, okay?
To begin with, that’s not even me.

I wanted to hit this idiot Pope over the head after he started screaming nonsense at the statue, but I endured the urge and walked up to him to tug at his sleeve.

“Anri-sama?”

He turned around and then tilted his head in confusion.
But this wasn’t the time to nitpick at details.
I cut straight to the point.

“Please have somebody chase after that statue.”

“Understood.”

In order to form a plan to stop it later, I need to know where it’s going, and what it’s going to do.
If we lose track of where it is, it’s going to become far harder to deal with it.
Although the Pope had been excited by the moving E.G.S., my serious tone caused him to gasp and change his att.i.tude.
It seems that he understood that I was panicked.
And in order to determine its destination, he quickly had the people around prepare to chase after it.

“I have sent a number of people to chase after the Divine Statue, so I expect a report will come to us shortly. Please stay in the Temple, Anri-sama.”

“Thanks.”

But although I thanked him, I continued to stare anxiously at the E.G.S., which had now gotten so far away that only the head remained visible.

What’s going to happen…

And although I wanted to hold my head in terror at how dark my future was looking, all I could do was continue to watch as it left.