Translated by: Jamechi

Edited by: Matsurika

Chapter 2.1

After waking up from my dream, I could not understand how I could have that type of fantasy about him. Still in disbelief over last night, I dreaded the moment we met on set. How could I look and interact with him as if nothing had happened? The chance of me pulling off a straight face when I see him is minimal. And just as I expected, the following day was a nightmare. 

On the drama set, our first interaction was similar to yesterday’s, him ignoring me. I stealthily glared at him and wondered how this arrogant man could be partner in the erotic dream. My sense of disbelief increased the more I thought about this. 

‘Ok, enough.’

Shaking my head, I scattered these thoughts and paid less attention to him. Instead, I looked at the others and noticed their attire for today. Since only the male lead was in his costume, everyone else was dressed normally. This was true for Jung Hwanwoo as well. Wearing a black shirt and pants, he was casually lounging around the set. Unlike yesterday, his hair was not groomed. Instead, it was messily arranged, allowing for strands of hair to reach out in different directions.

Despite his casual appearance, his mere presence attracted the gazes of others. This type of treatment did not occur for everyone. For example, if I had worn a wrinkled shirt and normal black pants like him, they would not seem as luxurious or fashionable. 

Slowly, the direction of my thoughts returned to my fantasies. Why did I have that type of dream about him?

Before this, I would not label myself as someone who is s.e.xually frustrated. Of course, if another person showed interest in me, then I wouldn’t refuse their advances. But, I wouldn’t roll in the sheets with them on the first encounter. I can’t deny Jung Hwanwoo’s s.e.xual appeal, but that is not enough to explain my wet dreams about him. If I reacted this way towards everyone, then I could’ve had similar dreams about Jang Dong Gun, another attractive man I saw yesterday. 

‘Why? Why? Why?’

 Lost in thought, I doodled on the script with a pen. Suddenly, I heard someone call out to me.

“Kyujin-ssi!”

“Huh?”

Confused, I raised my head and glanced around looking for the speaker. From the left, I could feel the gazes of others as they watched me. Blood rushed to my cheeks at this realization.

“Did you not listen to Hwanwoo’s part? I am not sure how to smoothen out his dialogue and would like your input.”

Having to interact with him now, I could only bite my lips in regret for not rejecting the cast of Jung Hwanwoo. If I had never met him, then I wouldn’t be having these nightmares.

Turning my head to Jung Hwanwoo, I was enraptured by his black eyes. This was the first time we made eye contact, and his eyes seemingly dragged me into their depths. Soon, I snapped out of it and asked him where he needed help.

“I’m sorry, I did not hear which part needed help. Where is it?”

“The second line in scene 24.”

Although I felt slightly insulted by his rude tone, a sense of guilt blocked any retorts. After having an erotic dream about him, the sensation of committing a sin enveloped me. As if I was caught in an illegal act, I frantically turned to the scene in the script.

Jung Hwanwoo played the role of a local chef in the drama. His character specialized in French cuisine, causing some French words to be present in the script. The most complex part was his psychological state. Within the script, the character is described as someone infatuated with his brother’s fiance. To hide his pain from losing his love to his brother, his pride and arrogance masked any signs of despair.

The scene in question was where the fiance met Jung Hwanwoo’s character for the first time in a restaurant. In this scene, Jung Hwanwoo’s character would confront an unhappy customer and feel attracted to the fiance at first glance.

“So what do you think? Why are geomungo[1] and gayageum[2] suddenly mentioned in our conversation?”

Hearing the actress’s scornful remarks, I was tempted to shut her mouth with the script. The scene was thoroughly described, but to be incapable of understanding the purpose. Was she drunk or actually trying to comprehend her lines?

“Although the scene occurs near the beginning of the drama, the fiance, Ming Jungseok, cannot be acted normally. The personality set for her is not something that can be understood with common sense. Her complex character should be able to help improve your acting.” 

Due to my lack of social skills, her reply to me seemed sarcastic.

“Isn’t it better to decrease or remove this sense of ambiguity on the character? Her obscure character makes it awkward to act out.”

Suddenly, Jung Hwanwoo piped in and gave her a reply that was three times harsher than mine. Looking up, I noticed that the actress in question was clinging onto his side with a shocked expression. 

“There is no issue on the character herself. The problem lies with your lack of ability to act.”

His serious expression erased everyone’s doubts on his intent. After his statement, the atmosphere of the crew grew tense. Noticing the uneasy expression on others’ faces, he furrowed his eyebrows. 

‘Ah.’

This was similar to how I initially felt in the dream last night.

“The only worrying part is at the beginning of the scene. It is a little confusing due to the screenwriter’s sporadic writing.”

 Now I’m irritated, I will explain the scene clearly.

“If you don’t understand the process behind the character, you can ask me. I’ll attempt to explain it as thoroughly as possible.”

“What I don’t understand is the purpose of having this strange line.”

“In my opinion, I think it is up to the actors themselves to figure out how to impersonate the character’s lines.”

“First of all, isn’t the writer supposed to have a clear direction for each character?”

I was getting frustrated at him.

‘If you think it is so easy, then why don’t you write the script instead!’ 

I was so tempted to scream at him, but my slightly timid side restrained me from doing so. Though I was close to bursting out.

“Aigoo[3], let’s relax a little and take a break! We haven’t even filmed a scene yet, it is no good if we are tense during filming. Screenwriter-nim[4], let’s have a drink to relax.”

In an attempt to break the tense atmosphere, Choi Soo-Hyung interrupted the conversation between Jung Hwanwoo, the actress, and me. The model turned actor acted as Jung Hwanwoo’s older brother in the drama, Min Joongjae. He was someone with more social capability than me, able to be friendly with most in the area. 

I heaved a long sigh, stood up, and left the room. 

Ever since then, an invisible war was waged between Jung Hwanwoo and me. 

Every time we met, it felt like I was a general in a b.l.o.o.d.y war. When others NGed, he would constantly make up absurd excuses to blame me for their inability to express their roles properly. Although our arguments frightened others, due to the interactions between characters, other actors would often be involved in our debates. In fact, his acting abilities were phenomenal. Seemingly flawless, Jung Hwanwoo’s scenes gripped onto your heart and mind. Despite the lack of emotional scenes, he managed to seize everyone’s attention through his own charismatic quality. With only one attempt, his scenes finished smoothly. Successfully capturing everyone’s admiration, even my own.

As the drama continued to be filmed, he continued to star in my wet dreams. Only through our petty arguments was I able to differentiate between fantasy and real life. If he had been kind to me while filming, then the dreams would’ve seemed like reality and I would’ve crossed my line of morals. To not hara.s.s another if they haven’t given consent.

Midway through the drama, I suddenly fell ill. Unless I was specifically asked for, only coughs escaped from my mouth, and my stomach ached constantly. This weakness in health stemmed from the repeated stress due to Jung Hwanwoo. In my dreams, we would have s.e.x whenever he appeared. After every stimulating dream, I would wake up physically exhausted, as if we really did have s.e.x. On the other hand, once the two of us interacted in reality, there would only be reoccuring arguments. The mental stress from our quarrels combined with my exhaustion pressured me into getting sick.  

Our arguments were littered with bickering and incoherent disapproval. With every word, I imbued my retorts with the pride of a writer. But after some time, the lack of sleep and mental strain slowly withered away this pride. Now, I retained a part of the writer’s dignity, but not as much as before. 

Translator"s Notes:

[1]Geomungo - Also known as the black zither, it is a traditional korean 6-string instrument that originated around the 4th century of the kingdom of Gorguryeo (Old Korea). It is based on the 7-string guqin, and is still used today in Korea.

 [2]Gayageum - Another traditional korean instrument that has 12 strings. It is the most well known traditional music device of Korea so far. 

[3] Aigoo - An expression Koreans use to indicate their frustration.

[4] … -nim - Attached to the end of names to show respect, similar to “... -ssi” in Korean or “Mr.” in English.