Kyou kara Ma no Tsuku Jiyuugyou!

Chapter 3

Chapter 3

The meeting is indeed underway.

When I heard that it’s a round table meeting, stupid old me immediately thinks of Mom’s favorite story, about King Arthur and the Knights of the Round Table. Come to think of it, there was even a guy in my middle school art society named ‘Arthur’[1].

I’m seated in the middle of a donut-shaped table, surrounded by Mazoku I only said hi to during my coronation. And every time someone is introduced, the table would turn so I faced said person. Although the table is round, it feels more like the Lazy Sues in Chinese restaurants, albeit the part spinning isn’t the center but the sides.

If it keeps spinning I’m sure I’ll get crazy dizzy—it feels like I’m suddenly the heart of a clock. And I’m the only one in the center, everyone’s gazes piercing me so sharply it really hurts.

“I-is this some sort of punishment game?”

I clench my fists on my knees. Logically speaking I should be more used to the spinning by now, but my armpits are drenched in a cold sweat. Anissina moves 60 degrees to face me, her slightly elevated sapphire eyes narrowed,

“Your Majesty. What happened to your hair?”

“It was sucked by ‘The Great Demon Odor Remover, Stinky Go Away-kun’, and became this SPP corn head.” [2]

The woman who bet her entire life on finding the ways to incorporate magic into daily life, the forever experimenting, experimenting, then experimenting again Lady von Karbelnikoff, is also one of s.h.i.+n Makoku’s Three Great Majou, and presently she reveals a smile that can rival the s.e.xy Queen Lady Cheri.

“Heavens, Your Majesty personally tested that prototype? I’m extremely honored, and would you please fill in the user survey form? Oh, yes, and would you want to try the new and improved ‘Stinky Go Away-kun’ 16 as well?”

“…I appreciate your good intentions.”

Thanks for the free test drive.

According to the previous introductions, the ones around the table are the Ten n.o.ble Families, the representative from ten places, or you could say they’re the representatives chosen in full authority by the people.

The one from the von Voltaire lands in Lord von Voltaire Gwendal, and Lord von Christ Günter from the von Christ territories is here too. On his left is the pa.s.sionate young Lord von Wincott, the temporary head of the von Spitzberg clan and representative of the von Bielefeld city —Lord von Bielefeld Wolfram, and Anissina with full authority from Lord von Karbelnikoff Densham. Next to her is the soldier from Radford who can barely keep his distance from the table. Lord Rochefort and Lord Gyllenhaal are there too, but I can’t remember their names. It’s already really impressive that I can remember nine of them at once.

As for the seat supposedly occupied by a member of the von Grantz family, for some reason there’s a big bear baby. Did that person say something he shouldn’t have?

There are other n.o.bles besides the highest representatives, seated by the wall away from the round table, including some familiar faces. I even see some women amongst them.

Günter, maintaining a respectful manner, clears his throat and spreads open a light green paper,

“Then, Your Majesty, before the meeting begins, allow me to first read the reports from the absentees. Um—Congratulations, Your Majesty, on today’s meeting, I sincerely wish the 27th Maou-heika, may you be healthy and may all your wishes come true. I cannot attend the glorious event due to circ.u.mstances, and offer my deepest apologies. On my inability to beg for forgiveness personally in front of Your Majesty, I am frustrated beyond words. Unfortunately I slipped and fell into my rear on a rainy day in the stables, causing myself to be covered in hay and horse excrement, and even worse, being trampled on by a horse and thus losing consciousness… Um, that… I will skip the details, and move on the next part. And so I sincerely wish that this imperial meeting will run smoothly, I and the chicken on my knee will be praying that the white team wins.”

Anissina gnaws her tongue lightly.

After reading a few more letters, Günter —who I a.s.sume is the speaker— suddenly announces the beginning of the meeting. As a gong resounds throughout the room, everybody stands in unison. I try hastily to get to my feet too, but before I can I hear an ear-piercing metallic sound, and then my arms and legs are locked onto the chair, just as a powerful spotlight s.h.i.+nes onto my head.

“Eh? What is this?!”

“Our deepest apologies, Your Majesty. Due to the former Maou’s high escape record… No, I mean, her tendency to leave the meeting halfway and then proceed to vanish into thin air, from this meeting onwards, we have decided to take such measures. Although it may be slightly uncomfortable, I beg of you, please don’t mind it.”

“How can I not mind?! Anyone would mind!”

Under these circ.u.mstances, even if a metal pot falls on me from the ceiling I can’t avoid it! On that note, Lady Cheri, why can’t you hold a meeting properly?!

By the way, this special round table was also designed for the former Maou whose only looks in certain directions. This way, regardless of the beauty or otherwise of the speaker, Your Majesty has to meet their gaze and hear their opinions.”

“In other words, Lady Cheri only looked at the handsome men…”

Just what I’d expect from the huntress of love, as soon as she locks on to her target, she won’t let them escape from her line of sight. But being cuffed to the chair like this, with a bright light s.h.i.+ning overhead, it feels less like a high level meeting and more like an interrogation by the cops…

Yamada, bring a bowl of pork chop rice! [3]

“This time, we are introducing a new method, to allow people from all over the country to partic.i.p.ate in the meeting. Please watch, Your Majesty, this is the live communication technique, made possible by gathering all our tribe’s intelligence and technology. Right, raise the curtain!”

Behind the rapidly rising blinds, there’s a huge hole in the wall, revealing the clear sky. Countless pigeons are resting on a ledge, and an army of kotsuhizoku are floating in mid-air. The afternoon rays s.h.i.+ne through the skeletons, creating a scene that looks like it came straight out of h.e.l.l.

“I thought there was the odor of birds, no wonder…”

“With these imperial carrier pigeons trained by trainers outsourced from companies all over the country, and the kotsuhizoku’s unique telepathic abilities, we can simultaneously exchange opinions with the other party. In other words, important conference officials who can’t make it here due to the short notice, can also listen in on the meeting from their respective locations, and actively offer their own ideas!”

…VIVA pigeon mail! BRAVO kohi!

Although no one understood the logic behind it, but I heard that the kotsuhizoku has some message-conveying ability. Instead of calling it bone messaging, it’s better to call it bone signaling, a gift of love from the physicochemical labs.

“You could even say that whoever with any opinions need not kept them pent up, you are free to vent and freak out as you please!”

Everyone else looks completely unconcerned, ignoring the over-enthusiastic Günter. Only Lady von Karbelnikoff Anissina mutters to herself, “It’d be much easier to just use my devices.”

“If you want to keep digressing, please bring it to another room, Lord von Christ. We don’t have much time to lose.”

“The pigeons carefully selected from all over the country… Ah, whatever… Then let’s return to the matters of the conference.”

Günter, who had been talking non-stop this entire time, finally sits down, and the conference officially begins.

The first few reports are about agricultural taxes, estimates on our a.s.sistance to neighboring countries and etcetera, all matters beyond my knowledge, so my uniform answer for all of them is “deal with it appropriately”. It’s the synonym of “full authority and responsibility goes to Lord von Voltaire”, and so the older son’s frown continues to deepen.

Eventually Günter rolls up a considerable number of doc.u.ments, and uses a different tone to announce the next topic.

“Then, let’s begin discussing the matter of most importance in this meeting—Shou s.h.i.+maron’s sudden diplomatic activities.”

“Shou s.h.i.+maron’s diplomatic plans?”

Despite all four of my limbs being cuffed to the chair, I immediately feel my body stiffen. So that’s it, that’s what Gwendal meant by ‘a first-rate emergency’.

Dai s.h.i.+maron and Shou s.h.i.+maron are two nearby countries ruled by a strong military force. In the war between mazokus and humans around 20 years ago, the human’s most considerable strength lay within the s.h.i.+maron army.

For someone who’s still unfamiliar with this world’s geography and history, I know this because I’ve personally been there. Not only did I meet with a terrifying disaster in Dai s.h.i.+maron, my experience in Shou s.h.i.+maron was even worse. It all began with Lady Flynn Gilbert, the iron-masked ruler of Caloria, a territory of Shou s.h.i.+maron, and the Wincott poison she retrieved from the bas.e.m.e.nt of her mansion…

One thing led to another, and those people even dared to destroy a section of the land on their own accord, all because they used the wrong key to open the most brutal, most evil of final weapons—the box. Back then we had been swept into that open experiment, and were forced to come face to face with the threat of the box. It just goes to show how lucky I can be to survive that, because that dangerous situation that day was nothing short of a death-defying special event.

Anyway, be it Dai or Shou s.h.i.+maron, the world-peace supporter in me doesn’t have a good opinion of either of them. When you consider the mazoku who had endured the flames of war to get here, their feelings right now must be a couple times more complicated than mine.

“According to our intel department and reliable sources, Shou s.h.i.+maron has been making some emergency diplomatic relations recently. From the s.h.i.+n Makoku’s position, we must find a way to prevent these plans, and maintain the balance in power between our countries.”

“Wait a second, why must we interfere with another country’s diplomatic relations? Although just thinking about s.h.i.+maron gives me a headache, but doesn’t doing this equal to interfering with another country’s inner workings?”

“If this matter can be resolved without our interference, that would be ideal, because we too would like to avoid any contact with the humans.”

Lord von Voltaire puts his elbows on the table, lacing his fingers together before his face.

“But the situation now is simply too sudden. If their policy works, they will pose a threat to our country unlike any other. That’s why, even if we have to directly interfere with their politics, we must make sure Shou s.h.i.+maron’s stops this policy.”

“W-what kind of scary policy is it?”

In this high school brain of mine that sucks at world history, there are only two terrifying international powers: Hitler or Hitler or Hitler… Okay, it’s just one. No, it’s one person that can count as three.

After clearing his throat slightly, Günter says,

“Shou s.h.i.+maron seems to be aiming to restore their relations with Seisakoku.”

Hah?

“They plan on interacting actively with the country that has locked itself away from the world for two thousand years, Seisakoku.”

What?

“What does that mean? Don’t tell me Shou s.h.i.+maron wants to form an alliance with Seisakoku?”

“Unbelievable, these really are troubling times.”

“My dear ministers, why are you still hesitating? We, the mazoku, must gather all our power right now, and teach them a lesson. We can’t let the humans lead us on any longer!”

“Seisakoku’s specialty is the rainbow-colored taro, sure hope I can taste it at least once before I die~”

The room is filled with cacophony, every other mazoku aside from me unable to hide the swaying of their hearts. On that note, what kind of a place is Seisakoku?

Under the instructions of their trainers, the carrier pigeons rise into the air amidst the noisy flapping of wings; and the kotsuhizoku is one step behind, chasing them in a chorus of bone chattering. Good luck, Kohi.

While sending them encouragement that they’ll never hear, I hesitantly interrupt,

“Uhm, just asking--”

“Yes, Your Majesty.”

“What’s wrong with restoring the relations?”

“What?! Your Majesty?!”

The super bis.h.i.+e’s expression looks shocked.

“They’re just trying to actively interact with a country they never communicated with, right? In the global point of view, isn’t that a really good thing? It will even improve the culture and economy of both sides. If j.a.pan was always in a state of lockdown, I might still be wearing a bun on my head now.” [4]

“You really are a wimp!”

“Mmph!”

Lord von Bielefeld’s bishounen voice interrupts the low grade question by the novice who is completely oblivious to diplomatic affairs, and his tone is one of extreme, undisguised surprise.

“Using the language from the world you grew up in, you really are, through and through, a wimp KING!” [5]

“Stop it, Wolf! Stop calling me a wimp in front of all these people, and also, don’t just pick up random words of Englis.h.!.+”

What you said, does it mean ‘even though you’re a wimp, at least you’re still a king’? Or are you calling me ‘the King of wimps’? [6]

“Do you know what kind of a country Seisakoku is?”

Nope. As for things that start with the word ‘Sei’ (holy), all I can think about is the holy bible every hotel drawer must have. My stuttering must have given me away, because the former prince’s expression becomes even sterner.

“Then I’ll use this chance to tell you.”

Wolfram points at the spread-out map.

“Look closely, this is s.h.i.+n Makoku, and this continent is Dai and Shou s.h.i.+maron, everything within this line…”

He sighs and continues grudgingly,

“…is s.h.i.+maron territory.”

“So big?!”

I put my hand on the map that looks like a honey cake wrapper. My finger follows the dotted line, touching the islands and continents within the boundary, and the words stating the countries’ names are sent directly to my brain.

“…Van dar Via is also s.h.i.+maron territory… Oh, yeah, Mr. Hyscliff’s land is also part of the same continent, but he’s working hard to rule it. It really is very big.”

“And then Seisakoku, is here.”

He grabs my right hand and brings it to the bottom of the map—Wolfram knows I’m not used to reading the words. The diamond-shaped land labeled Seisakoku is, in Earth terms, situated rather to the south, not too far away from the Antartic. It’s too big for an island, but small compared to the s.h.i.+maron continent. If the area of the s.h.i.+n Makoku is measured as one unit, then it would be somewhere between two point five to two point eight.

After using my pointer and thumb to trace the shape of the continent, I realize that even though the map did simplify it a bit, the other lands are differentiated with brown or green, only the diamond-shaped land underneath my fingers has nothing but the borders. I can’t see the mountains, the plains or rivers, the whole piece is just blank.

“Is it because the topography is really flat and smooth…”

“It’s because the lay of the land is currently unknown.”

As my dedicated tutor, Günter immediately rejects my guess.

“As aforementioned, Seisakoku has practiced a closed-door policy for more than two thousand years. So forget its current state, we have no idea of knowing anything about even its topography or climate. And the few merchants who are allowed to deal with said country can only enter via some pre-determined ports. Word has it that they have a small man-made island, where surveillance and security is so tight you can’t even leave without permission.”

“Just like Dejima in Nagasaki? [7] Or is it like Portugal?”

The discussion is becoming more and more like Nagasaki castella [8]… I mean, it’s slowly becoming simple enough for even an average high school student to understand.

“And to prevent the leakage of information, maps and books are highly prohibited from leaving the country. There were even people suspected and interrogated.”

“You mean, the Siebert incident.”[9]

“Yes, it seems they were scolded very severely.”[10]

“Why, Yuuri? Do you also start blabbering whenever you’re scolded?”

Misunderstanding, this is a huge misunderstanding!

“Anyway, this is the reason why no one knows Seisakoku’s actual condition? But being under lockdown for two thousand years is really too impressive. In Earth terms, that’s like being sealed away from before even Christianity was founded! Just thinking about it makes me want to faint. And now that tightly sealed door will open for Shou s.h.i.+maron! I’m not wrong, am I, putting it this way?”

“Amazing, Your Majesty! Aah, Your Majesty’s brilliance always awes me to no end!”

“But…”

I move my hand away from the map, rubbing my messed-up hair.

“Restoring relations, isn’t that a good thing…?”

“Your Majesty, about that…”

Lord von Voltaire, who seems to have been holding it in for a long time, speaks up in an extremely courteous tone. As for everyone else, they’re probably reluctant to interrupt me, seeing as I’m king and all.

“We, the mazokus, have a very tense relations.h.i.+p with s.h.i.+maron, of this I’m sure Your Majesty is aware?”

“That I know… C’mon, Gwen, whenever you use such formalities, you make me nervous!”

“Then do you understand how dangerous it is when countries hostile to s.h.i.+n Makoku try to strengthen their power? We cannot determine the extent of Seisakoku’s resources and military force, but considering the vast size of the country, we can probably estimate the reinforcements that will come with the alliance. If Shou s.h.i.+maron were to form a pact with that country, and combine their respective armies… Although I’m also unwilling, but I have to say…”

The wrinkle between his brows deepening some more, Gwendal crosses his arms in front of his chest.

“Our country’s strength alone cannot fight against them.”

There’s immediately a small riot in the room, and some people sigh. Others angrily punch the table, while the rest wordlessly stare at the ceiling. Only one person scoffs, laughing.

“What evidence do you have when you say that?”

I was wondering who could be so calm, turns out it’s Lady von Karbelnikoff Anissina, who is long used to emergency situations. Compared to an experiment gone wrong, the impact from the confession must not seem like much.

“This is from a reliable line of source…”

“What kind of line is that reliable source of yours? An electric line? A landline? Or a tasty line of noodles? Or is it your pride and joy, chosen based on their appearance and muscles, the ‘Heart skips a beat! Women-not-allowed intelligence department members can also leak information’ team?”

“Um…, our intel department doesn’t just depend on their face and muscles, they are all chosen based on the strictest criteria!”

“Shut your c.r.a.p! If so, then why are all the agents men with just face and no real power? And the only other members of the team are Kotsuhizokus to send messages!”

I see, so it really is like in the movies, the face really is the informant’s life. This feels like the dolls you put on display during Girl’s Day.

Anissina kicks aside her chair and stands up, her head tilted skyward and chin slightly raised. Although she looks small, her presence is no weaker than Gwendal’s.

“Then please enlighten me, how do these informants send their reports? He says Shou s.h.i.+maron will soon rapidly expand their diplomatic relations, aiming to restore relations with Seisakoku, right? That’s what he said? Tell me, is that what he said?”

Her way of talking is so forceful, her att.i.tude unyielding. But because she’s full of confidence, it’s easy for anyone of lesser will to surrender. At this moment I can’t help the urge to hug her legs and say, “Ooooohh~ Boss, or should I say, Onee-sama[11], I’ll follow you everywhere.” She’s the type of person who, in an election, will definitely win the middle votes.

“Everyone gathered here knows, Seisakoku’s relations with other countries stopped since two thousand years ago. Back then, s.h.i.+maron didn’t even exist. In other words, to the former, the latter can be said as a miniscule new power from the outside world, like a scab formed just a few days ago, or a newborn mudskipper or chick. And now they say they want to ‘restore’ relations, even grammatically it’s wrong. Do you think that with Shou s.h.i.+maron suggesting an alliance under these circ.u.mstances, will Seisakoku agree so easily? What do you think, Lord von Voltaire? You who have wasted almost a hundred and thirty years of your life, do you think you would possibly befriend a newborn baby? Would you treat him as an equal, give him a friendly hug and swear to live or die with him? Ah, if it’s you, you might just do so out of sentiment. But under those circ.u.mstances, the only one who would hug him so easily, could only be you who loves helpless little animals so much. Anyone who thinks normally would never sincerely make friends with a baby.”

The fingers Gwendal laced on the table twitches a little. I can almost hear him screaming inside: “If you know it, then don’t take me for an example in the first place!”

Anissina puts her hands on her hips, continuing in a tone that allows for no doubt. By now forty percent of the people in the room have been taking hostage by the red devil.

“Even if they are willing to make the deal, there’s no way they would listen to the human’s hopes and lend their military to s.h.i.+maron, is there? Listen up, everybody, this is that Seisakoku we’re talking about, y’know? Do you really think that the country that can’t even be bothered to deal with their neighbours would go through all the trouble of sending troops across the sea for a war? According to my judgment, the chances are as slim as strand of hair. And I mean a temple monk’s hair, that one hair that wasn’t shaved off! But all of you are jumping to conclusions based on such a small number, freaking out just because you’re scared of being threatened, or going to war—how stupid of you. Really, that’s why you men are so useless!”

Her last line forces several people to lower their heads and go silent, looks like they’re the ‘useless’ people she meant.

“…Lady Anissina r-really is something…”

As for me, I make the ultimate decree—‘if you want to live, don’t get on her wrong side’. Even though she and her high red ponytail don’t like anything like the bad guy.

“Do we really have to sway over a chance as thin as a hair missed by the razor, holding our heads and screaming that the country’s done for? Instead of everyone moping here and sighing, why don’t we first send someone from this table to the actual location and verify the information? On the off chance that Seisakoku actually does build relations with Shou s.h.i.+maron, and proceeds to make an unreasonable request with regards to military force, then why don’t we just interfere then? It’s just a hair-thin chance! All we have to is shave off that last hair, then we’ll be fine!”

“Please don’t mention shaving hair any more…”

For some reason Günter starts sobbing, probably because it brought up some bad memories for him.

“I see. Lady von Karbelnikoff’s words ring true, what about Your Majesty’s opinion?”

It took him a while to stop his finger movements, but Gwen throws the question at me abruptly, causing me to say in a strange voice,

“P-please deal with it appropriately.”

“Very good, how about everyone else?”

There aren’t any objections. Having taken over as speaker, Gwendal trains his seemingly annoyed gaze downwards, but then he immediately returns to his normal form, using that soul-shaking deep voice to announce to everyone present:

“The problem now is, who do we send? All of you know how tense the relations.h.i.+p between our country and Shou s.h.i.+maron is. Considering the current situation, we must not simply send our troops forth, lest we provoke the other party. Therefore, we can only send the minimum number of guards, so if there’s a general suited for defense in the envoy, we can rest much easier. And since this person will go as special amba.s.sador on an official visit, we must also send someone of appropriate status. Otherwise, not only will the other side look down on us, we would practically be creating an opportunity for them to strike where we are weak. Hence, we must make this decision cautiously, and take action cautiously. If anyone wishes to volunteer, please quietly raise your hand, Teacher won’t be mad, and close your eyes like this.”

“Gwendal, you should know who the best choice…”

Before Günter even finishes his sentence, everybody present raises their hands. As expected from the crème de la crop of the s.h.i.+n Makoku. I who also meant to raise my hand, am now left with an extremely painful wrist. I forgot that my hands were cuffed.

“So everyone is willing?”

Even Lord von Voltaire has his hand raised high, his frown deepening further. After he gazes around at all the attendees, his eyes stop on Lady Anissina.

“I hope Lady von Karbelnikoff can step back of her own accord. You will definitely cause damage to Shou s.h.i.+maron and bring unnecessary chaos. N-no, what I meant was, don’t you still have something important to do, like controlling the quality of the fermenting poisons? And Wolfram, you too.”

“Why, Brother?! I have the ability to protect my own safety, and I’ve even inherited the bloodline of the previous Maou. When it comes to status, shouldn’t I be the perfect man for the job? And more than anyone else, I have the spirit and patriotism that make a general. Please allow me…”

“Then should you mess things up, are you mentally prepared to disembowel yourself a punishment?”

Wow, just thinking about it makes me pale, eeeek—it sounds even more painful than seppuku.

“If you obtain everyone’s approval here and take upon yourself the duty of heading to Shou s.h.i.+maron, that is equal to a royal decree—in other words, you will be sent there as the representative of the s.h.i.+n Makoku under His Majesty the Maou’s name. If for some small reason you fail, the responsibility lies not only on you, but also on the Maou, maybe even the country. It’s not something you can shake off by regretting or apologizing, do you have the resolve to take up this responsibility with your life?”

Wolfram bites his beautiful lips, but then he immediately clenches his fist. Although he looks like a weak bishounen, he"s actually a pa.s.sionate man. I just discovered that today.

"From the day I swore my oath to the king, I"ve been prepared mentally for that."

The oldest brother"s expression looks even more painful. Unsurprisingly, because there"s no way Gwen would send his beloved youngest brother somewhere dangerous. But I was defeated by Lord von Bielefeld"s words. The decision this bad-tempered stubborn angel made puts his life on the line, and he even said he"s mentally prepared for it.

He said, "From the day I swore my oath to the king."

Which king?

I instinctively swallow. My tongue sticks to the roof of my mouth, which has suddenly gone dry.

It"s me!

Wolf is talking about us.

My tongue has gone stiff, but I can"t keep quiet just because of that. This is something a king should face. And since I"m the king of s.h.i.+n Makoku, this is something I must see with my own eyes. As my hand is cuffed to the chair, I yell desperately to get their attention.

"MeMeMeMeMe! I"ll go! I"ll go I"ll go I"ll go--!"

c.r.a.p, why does my voice suddenly sound as high as a woman"s.

“I’ll go to Shou s.h.i.+maron myself…”

“No!”

“No way!”

And I’m immediately rejected, with a stereo effect from both sides, no less.

“Why not! Isn’t this a huge crisis that can impact the country’s survival? If so, there’s all the more reason for me to scout out the situation, enemy surveillance is also an important duty, tight?”

“You barely just escaped from Shou s.h.i.+maron with your life! Don’t tell me you still don’t understand the kind of danger s.h.i.+maron poses to us mazokus after going through so much?”

“C’mon, Wolf, don’t make a fuss just because you can’t go! Besides, this is representing the country on an official visit, right? Then the other side will definitely treat us carefully as honored guests. I’ve seen this type of thing in the news too, I know what kind of treatment an international-level guest gets!”

“International-level guest? You’re saying those guys in Shou s.h.i.+maron will treat us as international-level guests?”

The bisohunen purposely raises his pitch, shrugging his shoulders in an American way,

“To those people, we are the only country that’s ever won them in a war. That’s a fact that won’t change even after twenty years, why would they treat the enemy they hate with all their heart as honored guests?”

“…But isn’t that the give-and-take way of interacting between adults?”

Even if the relations.h.i.+p is bad… No, even if we are at war, we must welcome the amba.s.sador with caution and respect. Isn’t that what they mean by international unions? Even if my confidence is beginning to sway, I desperately try to convince myself.

“Naïve. You really are too naïve, Yuu…”

The man in charge of s.h.i.+n Makoku’s first ever virtual live broadcast satellite pigeon team, is nervously clearing his throat, interrupting Wolfram’s words.

“Report! We just received the replies from Their Excellencies who could not make it. Now I will read them out for the audience: ‘Eh? What kind of place is Seisakoku? Although compared to pigeons, I prefer chickens~~” …This is Lord Densham von Karbelnikoff’s reply.”

Aren’t you too slow? And there’s no content to speak of.

“Next is from the Radford territory… What? Catalpa Number 2 was attacked by an eagle dog mid-flight and is currently missing in action?! How can this be… Unfortunately, the pigeon has died.”

The traumatised pigeon trainer sags his shoulders, as though saying now that the pigeons aren’t working, what about the Kotsuhizoku?

“ ‘Speaking of Seisakoku, it reminds me of the vast white lands of the south, apparently it’s a place filled with power of the G.o.ds. Oh, yeah, husband dear, today’s dish is ripe eggplant…’ That’s the content we got… Eek, ripe eggplant?! They dare to eat such a terrifying thing, what’s up with that couple?”

Although I’m more concerned about the tragedy that might come with using eggplants for a dish, I think it’s safe to say that this game of ‘telephone’ has failed. As man in charge, Gwendal’s hands start fidgeting again. He’s probably getting impatient with the fruitless meeting.

“If so, then I…”

“That won’t work—If Gwen leaves the capital, who’ll be in charge of the financial matters?”

He glares at me, hinting “that’s your job, y’know”, but practically speaking, the basic requirement for ruling is to use your talents where they work best. If everything is dumped onto an utterly useless king, then it won’t be long before the country is thrown into havoc. It’s precisely because his appearance, brains and leg length are all better than me, not to mention his wide expanse of knowledge and experience, that someone as careless as me can rest easy as king. Sorry I made the wrinkle in his brow even deeper, but other than asking him to work a little harder, there’s really nothing else to do.

Although… now I will occasionally remember, that this way of doing things is basically Gwendal’s own wish. Logically, on that nostalgic day of my coronation, he probably already knew that he would be running the country. The only thing he miscalculated is, I’m not the kind of king that will obediently follow orders.

The competent and therefore overworked oldest brother pushes the hair away from his forehead, saying,

“Either way, His Majesty, Lord von Bielefeld and Lady von Karbelnikoff cannot go. If someone can help me deal with the mountain of trivial matters here, I sincerely hope I can go myself. Lord von Wincott is in danger if ever he leaves the land, so I would recommend sending Lord von Rochefort…”

“I’ll go.”

These words spoken abruptly out of necessity instantly shut everyone else up. After all, he’s the one person no one thought about.

“If it is possible, I am willing to head to that country under Your Majesty’s orders.”

All eyes turn to him, and Lord von Christ Günter is looking straight at me.




References ↑ A pun about someone whose name sounded a lot like ‘Knights of the Round Table’ ↑ Could be the Yankee’s hairstyle of the 80/90s, or the ones used by the bosozoku, those Yankee guys in motorcycles. It’s the pompadour with the hair in the shape of a “corn”, references here: ↑ I think this is a reference to a police show he uses quite often? ↑ Probably referring to the medieval j.a.panese hair style for men, around the Edo period. ↑ Any words originally in English will be in full caps. ↑ The original text being ‘King of 窩囊废’ xD ↑ A manmade island from the 17th century when j.a.pan was under lockdown, has trade affairs with Holland, was the country’s only window to the outside world ↑ A simple and sweet sponge cake ↑ In 1828, Dr Siebert from a Dutch marine company was discovered with a prohibited j.a.panese map on his way out of the country, and so he was expelled from the country and forbidden from returning. ↑ ‘Scolding’ and ‘Siebert’ sound the same in j.a.panese ↑ Yakuza term for lady gang leader xD