Chapter 471: A Part of Him
"Ma said that you are leaving," Diana appeared at his door while Arthur was looking at the notification. Her words made him snap out of his daze, and he raised his gaze to meet hers.
There was an awkwardness in the air, as both did not know what to do next. All they did was look at each other until their familiarity transcended into obscurity.
"The city needs me," he said as he pressed his palm on the table to stand up. "I have been absent for far too long. The war summit does not need me to stay."
"You know of the king"s plan," she said while tightening her fist. "Are you leaving me here alone with them? You are avoiding me. No, not that. You are discarding me," she threw her hand, and a layer of frost covered the room.
As the frost touched Arthur, his soul shivered at the coldness. This coldness resided within her, and it accompanied eternal loneliness. Her face was broken, revealing how hurt she was feeling.
"You are the first person that I held ever since my powers awakened," she receded her hand and laid it on her chest. "You are the only person I allowed into my heart. So, why do you refuse," her tears spilled, "to do the same?" a m.u.f.fled sob leaked from her mouth.
Arthur was silent, as he had no words to refute her claims. He had no right to say that she was wrong and rea.s.sure her. This was more than a one-time rejection; she could tell that he hid everything from her.
"You refuse to tell me anything. Yet, I need to accept that you are leaving. I have no idea why you need to leave, where you are going, and when. I just need to shut my mouth and accept it because I know that I will be thrown away if I say too much. You won"t stay by my side after that, and..." she took a deep breath, "and I will break without you. I was fine before meeting you, and now I wish I did not. At least, you wouldn"t have become the only thing I desire."
Her tears flowed down as sentences followed sentences until all left was silence. Arthur looked at her disheveled strands of hair covering her face, which had been stained with tears. The shards going through her tied hair were now soft blue, resonating with her sadness.
Arthur did not answer, but he walked towards her. Diana did not look at him but downward as they were a foot apart. His hand reached out toward her face, and he raised her head to look at her.
Two streaks of tears have left their marks on her face, and her blue eyes were like mirrors of the ocean. Arthur has underestimated how much his rejection broke her heart. It was a betrayal of her belief that he wanted her as much as she wanted him.
"I will tell you everything," he said while closing his eyes. "I"m so sorry for hurting you, my love. Please forgive me. I will tell you everything about me, and I will tell you why I feel what I feel."
***
They were sitting beside each other on the outskirt of the capital, sitting on a d.y.k.e that oversaw the giant river. The lights of Livia reflected on the water, painting the most beautiful of scenery.
"I awakened my powers a few months ago," Arthur revealed as they held hands. "I cannot say a lot about the origin of my powers, and I don"t know a lot myself. All I know is that it came with a price."
"A price?" she was confused, and Arthur nodded in response. His hand held hers as he raised them, and a soft glow left his body.
"In the beginning, I only thought that I was overwhelmed by how much my life changed. I wanted to help others, and I wanted to live by my ideals. However, I began to change the more I used my powers. I only noticed it when I arrived in this world."
"Are you saying..."
"I am from a different world, as all Verniz people are. We are lost because this is not our world."
"Why didn"t you tell me before?" she was more confused.
"I came to an unfamiliar world. I had no choice but to hide everything and pretend to be a part of it. And in the process, I began to lose my feelings."
***
Arthur told her everything that happened to him and how he felt every time he used his powers. It never occurred to him that he would be okay with killing people, but he turned more ruthless and less apathetic toward life and death.
This change would have slipped past his notice if not for the Spirits Sovereign confirming it. But, then, the last time he used his powers made Arthur sure that it was true.
The more he used his powers, and the stronger he became; Arthur would lose a part of his emotions. Every time he draws power from existence, a part of himself becomes one with it, the same feeling he had when he awakened. At that time, The Scholar Guardian stopped him from losing himself.
It was an unconvincing tale, and Arthur tried to avoid mentioning the golden eyes and some of the details that would only make her worried.
"Your world is the place that you want to go back to," she was looking downward. "We cannot be together because eventually, you will leave this world."
"And this timeline," he added, and she turned to him. "I found clues that when I fell between worlds, I went back in times."
"How much are we separated by?" her lips pressed against each other.
"A hundred years, at the very least," Arthur was honest. "I"m not sure about going back, to begin with. But, on the other hand, I have reasons to believe that Solomon will find a way for me to return, and so I need to make him trust me."
"This is absurd," she gritted her teeth. "Are you saying that if you go back, I cannot see you for a hundred years, and it wouldn"t be guaranteed?"
"You can come with me," said Arthur without expectations, and she froze. "However, I know that it"s not easy. This is your world and the only place that you are familiar with."
"My mother," she began. "I cannot forgive what happened to her. My family is still in the north. I need to..." she began to grow uneasy.
"Diana," he said as he leaned toward her. "We will find a method to be together. I promise you. I am tired of running away, too, so I will not stop until we both have a place. We will do everything we can to be together."
"I understand," she raised her eyes to meet him. They were full of determination and seriousness. "It does not matter what lies ahead. Whether it"s my father, the n.o.bles, or the whole world, I will kill them all if they stand in our way."
"A bit too intense," Arthur laughed. "I need to ask you something. I already told you about how I lost my feelings. This includes what I feel toward you."
"Have you started to love me less?" she calmly asked, and Arthur nodded. "I see. Then we also need to find a solution to that."
"A solution to what?"
"You told me about the Spirits Sovereign and the First Seeker too," she said. "That means that if you are indeed the reincarnation of the First Seeker, then all we need to do is to retrieve your ability to feel."
"It was a part of a contract that..." Arthur was about to refuse the notion, but she suddenly kissed him. It was a few seconds before she pulled back.
"You were not the one to agree to that contract," she said with a smile. "We will retrieve what was yours, and you can love me all you want at that time," she said with a smirk.
Arthur blinked his eyes because he never thought it was retrievable. It was always a price for his powers, and he didn"t know if he could heal. However, Arthur wanted to believe in that.
"Why are you so quiet? I hope you are not..." as she was saying with a pout, Arthur was the one to lean in and kiss her. Diana leaned back to lay on the ground as they embraced each other"s warmth.
"I will find a way," Arthur said as he pulled back, looking at her flushed face illuminated by the lights. Her lips parted as she breathed rapidly. "I will find a way to keep this," he said as his lips met hers again. At that moment, there was no one in this world but them.
Arthur knew he might be on the wrong path, but he decided what right and wrong were this time. The person in front of him has become a part of him now, and he needs to stay whole.