Chapter 730
If there was a rock-paper-scissors match where winning would win 1,000 won and losing meant nothing, everyone would want to do it. If winning meant 10,000 won and losing meant losing 1,000 won, most people would still probably do it. The risks were low and the chances of winning were high. Then, increasing the scale a little, what if winning meant 100,000 won and losing meant losing 10,000 won? People would start hesitating. What if it was 1 million for a win and losing 500,000 for a loss? Those who had deep pockets might try, but the number of partic.i.p.ants would decrease significantly.
Maru took his finger off the call b.u.t.ton. This was a gamble that staked the very purpose of his life, no, something even more fundamental than that. If he succeeded, he would gain mental stability and the willpower to forge ahead, but if he failed, he would lose all motivation to move forward and would collapse on the spot. Stopping would be fortunate. He might end up regressing. Everything might come to an end.
Maru wished for her success and stared at the name ‘Han Gaeul’, which he saved on his phone, before closing the phone. The masked man referred to ‘her’ several times. He even gave a hint as to who ‘she’ was: the woman you’ll love forever. Only one person came to mind when Maru thought of that. If Gaeul was the reason his life was being repeated, things would get complicated. It meant that the life of Han Maru was centered around Han Gaeul.
The Han Marus that died until now all married Gaeul without fail. The probability of marrying the same woman in numerous different lives with infinitely many variables was probably around the same as tossing coins and making a tower by lining them up vertically. No matter how much the memory-reset Han Maru tried, it would be impossible to always win over the heart of an individual. Although his life was being repeated as though he was on a hamster wheel, he heard through the masked man that the quality and the structure of the hamster wheel had changed every single time.
Was it a cruel coincidence? Or was something like fate at play? Perhaps the condition for him to revive was to meet Han Gaeul.
“Fine, let’s say that I revive like that.”
Maru looked at the luminescent stickers on the ceiling. If she was the cause of these revivals, then why did her memories not carry over? Why did the requester have her memories turn into a blank sheet, while the benefitter got one lifetime’s worth of memories?
What puzzled him above all was the ident.i.ty of the woman in the white suit. The masked man referred to three ‘people’ as ‘her’ or ‘she’. The woman in a white suit, the rabbit, and the ‘woman you’ll love forever’. If these three were the same individual, the woman in the white suit would equal Han Gaeul based on circ.u.mstantial evidence.
Everything would be solved if he could meet the woman in a white suit. Maru laughed in vain. The masked man did not say a word about the things that were important. The woman in the white suit might also shut her mouth if he tried to approach the truth.
Whenever he looked at the woman in a suit, he felt that her beauty transcended humanity, but he was also given a familiar feeling if he looked closer. If that woman’s ident.i.ty was Han Gaeul, that would also explain why he had a sense of déjà vu.
Maru went out to the kitchen and took out some coffee milk and chocolate from the fridge. It was time to supply his hardworking brain with some nutrition. Perhaps he would get some creative ideas if he greased the folds of his brain with some sugar.
“I want some too.”
Bada had come out of her room and spoken. Maru was sure that she had sensors that could detect snacks.
“Why are you at home?”
“Today is the school’s founding day. Why? You feel jealous because your sister is on break?”
“I didn’t say anything.”
“You’re taking a rest by using the excuse of work too.”
“I’m going to be leaving soon.”
“Really? So you are busy.”
“Would you like to go in my stead?”
“What celebrities are there?”
“None that you know of. Probably.”
“Then forget it. I’ll just watch TV at home. Rather than that, why don’t you give me some of that thing in your hands?”
Maru snapped the chocolate in half and gave it to his sister. Bada put the chocolate in her mouth.
“You don’t like chocolate that much. What’s up with you today?”
“It’s not my mouth that wants it. It’s my head.”
“Your head? Are you sick?”
“I wish I was sick instead. That"s a much simpler problem.”
Bada tilted her head before turning around and telling him to get some sleep if he was feeling tired. Maru turned on the TV and sat down on the sofa. It would be great if he could narrow down his hypothesis, but he didn’t have a single piece of concrete information and the number of variables kept increasing.
“If you’re inside, why don’t you answer me?” Maru questioned inwardly.
The masked man, his sole helper, had started a silent protest a while ago. It wasn’t that he disappeared. He still existed inside him and kept giving him help when it came to acting-related things. If there was a change, it was that personal conversations came to a stop. At this time, Maru was unaware whether the masked man was willingly shutting his mouth or whether he was forced to do so.
The reporter on the TV screen was making a happy expression as she ate a piece of freshly-made rice cake. The trivial happiness of eating delicious food seemed so far away from him. He was walking on top of a thin sheet of ice that might break at any moment. No matter how careful he was, if one wrong step broke that sheet of ice, all that would await him was the freezing cold water. He could neither return nor stop right now. The only thing he could do was to keep walking ahead while putting all his senses on their edge with the mindset of gambling.
After continuously changing the channel with the remote in his hand, Maru checked the time and turned the TV off. He put some clothes on and picked up the bag he put the script in before leaving the house.
“I told you to come out when I call you.”
“I came out ahead of time to cool my head a little.”
Byungchan unlocked the doors, telling him to get in quickly. Having gotten in the car, Maru uttered a short sigh. The season was now one where the heated air from the car felt welcome.
“You look tired. I heard you almost collapsed on set a while ago.”
“How did you know?”
“I have my ways.”
“I didn’t tell you about it because I thought you’d worry. The doctor said it wasn’t anything much either.”
Byungchan nodded.
“Yes, it’s you we’re talking about, so I’m sure you can take care of yourself, but please tell me about it. There are things that we should take care of at the company level.”
“Okay. I was too short-minded there. I will call you next time.”
It was true that he didn’t report properly because he felt chaotic organizing the thoughts that flooded his mind.
“Take this and drink it.”
When the car stopped in front of a traffic light, Byungchan gave him a pouch. From how there was a picture of a deer on the front, it seemed to be some sort of medicinal tonic.
“You see that in the back? It’s a gift from the president. There’s yours as well as some for your family. You said you had a sister right? Apparently, he also gave you Clarity Tonic or something that apparently helps when studying.”
“Looks like I must give him a call to thank him.”
“He looks after his own people.”
“Yes, that’s true.”
He tore open the vinyl pouch and drank it in one gulp. It tasted similar to oriental flu medicine that was sold on the streets. It seemed that the taste would be similar if the medicines used were for general purpose use.
“You should have one too.”
“Shall I?”
Byungchan didn’t refuse. It was probably him who needed medicine the most. As he had experience working as a manager, Maru knew the hards.h.i.+ps that came along with it.
“I think I feel energetic now.”
“You should look after yourself too. I feel like you’ve become thinner even though you got a promotion.”
“It’s true that I just have to look after you and Sooil now, but it doesn’t mean I have less work. We just got a new member, so I’m teaching him, but he’s shy around strangers. I’m realizing how hard it is to teach other people.”
“A shy manager huh. He must have a hard time.”
“Yeah. Although he said he’s going to do his best, he’ll probably change his mind once he gets shouted at by a producer or an a.s.sistant director. Heck, I’m nervous even now that he might quit. We’re lacking manpower here, you know?”
“You must be having a hard time, but what can you do? You got promoted to a position with more responsibilities, so you should accept the risks a.s.sociated with it.”
“I like how I got a pay raise, but I don’t know if I’m really benefitting or not because the stress was increased as well.”
Byungchan twitched his nose and smiled.
“But I’m glad to see you and Sooil doing well. These days, I barely sc.r.a.pe by seeing you two.”
“I’ll do my best so that you can earn a lot of incentives. If I do even better, I’ll buy you a car.”
“Thanks for your words. But you know, I have a good memory when it comes to things like that.”
“Sure. If I do become successful, you should look into what car you want to buy. I’ll make sure you sign the deal.”
They arrived near the shooting location. Maru told him to stop the car.
“Today, Sooil has a shoot in the countryside, so I don’t think I can pick you up afterwards.”
“Alright. Take care. Watch out at night.”
“Yeah, you too. Also, I’ll deliver the medicine to your house. I was originally planning to call you and have you carry it back to your house before departing, but I completely forgot about it.”
“I’ll call my sister about it.”
Maru closed the car door. Today was Sat.u.r.day morning. He couldn’t make any time no matter how much he adjusted his schedule, so he took the day off school. He judged that his work was more important than his studies, so he had no hesitation. His attendance record also wouldn’t have a gap if the agency sent an official doc.u.ment to the school.
The streets were still calm. Things would only start to heat up with music and street performances after sunset. He walked down the streets that didn’t have a distinction between pavement and the road before entering the alleyway that led to the shooting location. The commercial street gave him a different sensation during the day than at night. The worn-out and rusty buildings added to the deserted feeling of the street. The streets looked spooky at night and had traces of humans, but with everything revealed under the sunlight, the street looked more like a shantytown. Maru wouldn’t find it strange even if a bulldozer razed everything down tomorrow.
People were gathered a vague distance away from both the residential area and the old commercial buildings. They were at the orange pojang-macha that had flapped its wings under the sun.
“You’re here.”
Producer Jayeon waved at him.
“I saw that the streets looked haunted during the day.”
“That’s why I like it even more. If I get the camera to shoot it from this angle, it gives off the feeling that it’s the endpoint of life.”
Maru looked at the buildings that looked like they were about to collapse from where Jayeon was standing. He could understand what she meant by ‘end point’. The buildings that had their steel beams exposed looked like the mound of a grave made from concrete.
“Maru, I heard you collapsed?” Ganghwan said after suddenly appearing behind him and putting his arm around Maru’s shoulders.
“Is someone going around spreading the word? I’m pretty sure I’m not that famous.”
“I was drinking with the president and you came up. Hey, kid, you can’t afford to run out of stamina so early on. Even I don’t have a history of collapsing and I’m reaching my mid-thirties.”
“Looks like I collapsed in your stead so that you don’t.”
“That sounds commendable. Did you get the tonic?”
“Yes, I got it through Byungchan-hyung.”
“I told the president to give you some. Be grateful.”
“Who paid for it?”
“Of course, big brother president did. I’m in no position to buy other people tonics. I’m already low on money because I used up all my savings to visit Russia.”
“But you should be able to save up again quickly, can’t you?”
“Hey, it’s people like Geunsoo who can save up quickly. No wait, maybe it’s Miss Suyeon.”
“You still call her Miss Suyeon? You dropped the polite speech with her, didn’t you?”
“For some reason, I wanted to call her with an honorific. You know how I feel right?”
“Haha, I do. I really do.”
“But there really isn’t anything wrong with you, right?”
“If there was, I would have gotten the doctor to diagnose it and then give the company the diagnosis, so they pay for the medical fees. Unfortunately, I’m so healthy that I can’t even get vitamins.”
“Yeah, yeah. I thought it shouldn’t be anything much when I heard you collapsed.”
“Why?”
“Because people who have less humane beauty live the longest.”
Ganghwan walked over to the pojang-macha after slapping him on the shoulders. Maru laughed in vain before he took out his script.
“s...o...b..e.”
He raised his head when he saw the shadow cover his script. He saw Yuna smiling.
“You’re here early.”
“The traffic was good.”
“Same for me. I came here in my mom’s car, and we didn’t get caught at a traffic light even once. It was so congested at night too.”
Yuna brought a chair and sat next to him. Maru quietly stared at her.
“s...o...b..e, what is it?”
“Yuna.”
“Yes?”
“We’ll be great friends, right?”
“Friends? We’re friends right now.”
“Yes, just like now.”
Yuna faintly smiled as she blinked. Maru took his eyes off her and looked at his script.