Losing Control

Chapter 14

I took off my coat and went to sit next to her on the couch. "How can you tell?" I asked, dipping into her popcorn.

"The fact that it"s almost six in the evening on Sunday," she said. "When you left on Friday."

I could barely believe it myself. "The weekend became longer than we expected."

"So you two hit it off, huh?"

"Penny," I said. "He"s sweet! And caring! And so, so good in bed!"



Penny laughed. "Good to know you finally lost your post breakup virginity."

That made me laugh too.

Everything we did over the weekend kept playing itself over and over again in my head. I didn"t want to jinx it but everything was just perfect. I couldn"t help but feel a little afraid. Usually when things were this perfect there was something truly awful lurking around the corner. But I didn"t care. Right now, it felt like the best thing in the world, and I was okay with feeling that way. I couldn"t be afraid that every man would be Nick, because that simply wasn"t true. I think it was testimony enough that despite detesting men in general, Penny didn"t seem to mind my seeing Thorne. She must have liked him if she approved of him. I was going to take that as a good sign.

I had been thinking about the week-long invite, the avacation" as Thorne called it. It didn"t seem like such a bad idea anymore, though when he had told me I had freaked out just a bit. Now I knew it might be actually be a good thing. It might help bring me out of the sh.e.l.l that I"ve been trying to secure myself in ever since the breakup with Nick. I couldn"t let Nick run my life anymore. He had already done enough damage; he wasn"t going to dictate who I went out with or who I decided to have a relationship with. I refused to give an ex that sort of power.

Maybe this time, for once, it would all work out.

THORNE.

The door to my office opened and Elena stepped in. We hadn"t told anyone about our thing, Elena wanted to wait and I wanted her to feel comfortable and not be forced into something. We had been going out a whole month and keeping that secret wasn"t always easy but we were managing it so far.

"Hey," she said, coming over to my table to sit across from me. "Not done yet?"

"No," I said. "I need a few more hours."

"Thorne," Elena said. "It"s eight in the evening. Everyone else is already gone, it Friday."

I felt like someone just broke the trance I was in. I checked the time on my wrist watch and she was right. It was past eight. "So everyone"s gone?"

"Yes."

"Why are you still here?"

"I thought I"d ask you what you"re doing tonight," Elena said. "But I can see that you"ve planned to cheat on me with work."

I lifted the pen and got up, walked over to her side. I trailed the non-ink side of the pen over her bare shoulder. "Well," I said. "Maybe if everyone"s already gone we can f.u.c.k here?"

She looked embarra.s.sed at the suggestion but her chest started to heave. I knew she was getting excited just as she was getting uncomfortable. "I should go," she said and tried to get past me but I caught on to her hand. "I think you should stay," I whispered in her ear.

She looked like she was swayed for just a second before she pushed me away. "No," she said.

I grinned. "Are you saying that for your benefit or mine?" I asked.

She blushed. "You need to quit that," she said, unable to stop a smile from forming. "Penny"s been bugging me for weeks now to go with her. If you"re busy then I"ll hang out with Penny and her friends for one night. We can do something tomorrow if you"re free."

"I"m free," I said and leaned against the desk, watched her movements. This was what I was going to be missing tonight. But if I didn"t get the work done today, I"d be distracted all weekend and I couldn"t have that. It was better to get over with it now.

"Okay then," she said, hiding a smirk. "I"ll be off."

"I"ll call you," I said.

When she was at the door, she turned. "Have a good night," she said with that lovely smile of hers and I was just about ready to leave everything behind.

"You too, Elena."

My phone started vibrating on the desk.

I picked it up. "h.e.l.lo?"

"Thorne?" I could hear Cyndi crying on the other end.

I dropped work and my attention was towards her. Cyndi wasn"t the crying type. Most of the time her headstrong att.i.tude made people forget that she enjoyed being a submissive in bed. "Cyndi? Is everything okay?"

"I need to see you, Thorne."

"I"m kind of stuck with something."

"Thorne, it"s my father."

I knew I couldn"t ignore that. "Give me half an hour," I said. "I"ll be right over."

"Okay."

ELENA.

Things had been perfect. Okay so life was actually never that perfect and there was always something happening in the background, but things had happened that had the power to make those other bad stuff look like it was nothing. That was what being with Thorne was like. It made me forget that the c.r.a.ppy stuff around my life was there. It made me not worry about the bad things that were supposed to bother me, and it made them less frightening, less depressing. Somehow, just because I was with him, everything was better because he made it better. There hadn"t been a single day that I regretted being with him or regretted making that decision. I even started writing again, which was a bigger deal than the fact that I was finally starting to let my walls down, at least around Thorne.

"Elena," I heard Penny"s voice as I come out of the bathroom.

"Yes?" I went over to the dressing table to blow dry my hair. "What weird place are we going this time?"

She looked taken aback. I could see her reflection in the mirror and I was enjoying it. "Do you have psychic powers or something?"

"Living with you all this time might have done it. Now, please. Tell me already."

"Jess is coming to pick us up with her boyfriend."

"So?"

"So, you need to get ready," she said, and I noticed she was wearing the s.k.a.n.kiest top in the history of female clothing but it looked amazing on her.

"I don"t know Penny," I said. "You"re going to hook up and she"s already hooked up, and I don"t feel like being by myself tonight."

"Come on, that only happened a couple of times!" Penny argued. "In my defense those men were gorgeous."

"I think it would be better if you guys went without me."

"You"re coming," she said with finality in her voice. "I won"t take no for an answer. You"ve been hanging out with Mr. Smarty Pants all month! I will seriously bug the living c.r.a.p out of you if you don"t go. You won"t be able to go back to your precious writing, which is what you were planning on doing anyway, I know that much."

"Real mature, Penny."

"Who cares!" she almost cried. "Please, we"re getting late just do it!"

"Fine," I said. "Just leave me alone and I"ll get dressed, alright?"

Penny happily walked out of the room. I picked out a dress and a pair of earrings from Penny"s collection, then choose a pair of high heels that I know I"m never going to be comfortable in, but I just feel like wearing them. When Jess and her boyfriend Travis come in after about ten minutes, I can tell Jess is high.

"Penny she"s not okay to drive," I said when the couple wasn"t looking. "One of them better be sober enough to drive. It"s not going to be me."

"Don"t worry," Penny said. "Travis is fine. I promise. Now let"s go!"

So Travis drove us to the venue and he wasn"t high or drunk. In fact I had never seen him that sober. When he stops the car, we were at a building where there was no sign of an entrance. Travis got out and Jess did too and I was walking behind with Penny.

"This doesn"t look like a place we should be entering Penny," I said when we finally find a way to enter, and are frisked by a bruiser in front of a ma.s.sive gate. "Are you sure about this?"

"This one is a bit more private than the others," Penny said. "Just trust me."

When someone said trust me it was a sign you shouldn"t trust them. But since it was Penny I went along with it. I could hear the music and the laughter before we"d even entered the main building. The closer I got to the place the more I saw the strangest couples in the strangest costumes, pa.s.sing us by. There seems to be some sort of theme but I don"t think I was dressed for it. I was about to ask someone what was going on, when I found myself in the middle of something that looked like an audience. In the middle of the room, is a stage, where there are two performers, a couple, male and female, and they male is sort of showing of the female and then I saw the paddle in the male"s hand.

"Oh my G.o.d," I blurted when I saw what was happening on the floor. "Penny!"

But Penny looked just as surprised as me. I was certain Jess and Travis forgot to tell where they were taking her and she was a bit annoyed too, just like me.

"What the b.l.o.o.d.y f.u.c.k?!" That was the sound of her jaw dropping.

The girl on the stage floor she now had her back to the audience and she was in lingerie made with leather and the male proceeded to tie her to a giant aX." I told myself I couldn"t possibly watch what was going to happen next without getting scarred for life. I mean, I get that some people get off on this stuff, and that"s fine, it"s just...not my thing.

I felt Jess"s hand grabbing hold of mine as she led me away from all this, and I was quick enough to drag Penny"s hand so she came along too. Jess was giggling and obviously having a lot of fun at our expense. "You haven"t seen the best part," she said and that worried me.

"Great," I managed. I gave Penny a glare but now she was also laughing. "Am I the only one who takes this stuff seriously?"

I didn"t stop walking until I was outside that arena.

And that was when it dawned on me: We were in a bondage club.

That was what these people did. This place was here, so people can come here and do that.

"Is it just me or is this whole thing incredibly hot?" Penny said.

"Of course it"s hot," Jess said.

From somewhere Travis entered the picture. "Are you going to just stand there?" he said to Jess. "Or are we going to get started?"

"Get started?" I said, confused.

Travis pulled Jess close to himself and kissed her cheek. "We come here sometimes," he said and pointed to a hallway. "Those over there, are the private rooms. Members can book them and do whatever they want."

"But we"re not members," Penny said.

"I got a free pa.s.s," Travis said, grinning. "For all four of us."

"Let"s go," Jess said, in a low whisper and they went off towards the room and disappeared into the hallway.

Just like that they were gone.

"What are we supposed to do now?" I asked Penny.

"I don"t know," Penny said. "Let"s just explore."

"Explore what?" I was about to ask her when I saw a couple walking towards us. But then I realized they weren"t walking towards me, they were going towards the private rooms. I couldn"t see their faces, the lighting was too dim, but the guy was in a suit-the same suit I had seen someone else wearing not more than an hour ago.

"Thorne?" I said, a little too loudly.

He turned towards me and I could see his face more clearly now, but the girl was wearing a blonde wig and her face was not visible because of the dim lighting. "Elena?" he said and even the tiny bit of doubts were suddenly confirmed. I was filled with rage and the only thing I could think of doing was to storm out. When Penny called after me I told her I needed to be alone and just kept walking until I was breathing fresh air.

"Elena wait!" I heard him calling out and he grabbed my arm, pulled me towards him.

"Let go of me!"

"It"s not what it looks like," Thorne said. "She"s just a friend."

"Yeah," I said. "That"s why you"re in here with her after telling me you were busy with work! You lied to me, Thorne!"

"I didn"t...Elena I never lied to you. After you left, she called and I"ve never told you about her so I didn"t see the point in telling you where I was going. I thought I was going to be done and I would go back to work."

"You"re lying."

"Elena she"s just a friend," Thorne said.

"That"s why you were taking her to the private rooms?"