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CHAPTER 308

She felt nothing and that was why she did not respond to the kiss.

With Ye Cheng, it came naturally and she who wasn"t that experienced in kissing found that she loved it when he kissed her and she responded quite well, matching her rhythm with his.

"Ye Cheng, I am sorry but now I know better. I know my heart belongs to only you and would beat just for you. Soon I would fix things and return to your side once more." Li Jing thought.

"Would you forgive me?"

"Yeah. I will."

"Thanks."

"Hmm," she managed a smile at him to ease his worries but deep down, she wondered how she was going to tell him that she did not love him but loved someone else.

"Okay, umm where else do you want to go?" Tang Zixin asked breaking the awkward silence that ensued.

"I do not know," Li Jing replied looking all dull.

"Hey, Jing. What is the matter?"

"Nothing really. I just… Can we go home, please? I think I need to rest my head. I feel tired."

"It is alright. I understand. Come, let"s go."

He held her hand and led her away from the flower shop.

Deep within him, he knew that she was not okay because of what he did and a part of him wished, hoped and prayed that she would not get angry and shift from him.

If that were to happen, it would hurt him so much as he had already given himself up to her.

Ever since he lost his parents, he did not deem it fit to open up to anyone as he did not know whom to trust.

But now, after meeting Li Jing, he opened his heart to her but he was too scared that he may have been wrong in doing so.

He looked to his side and saw her mumbling something to herself and smiled. She was acting like a child who was caught in an act and was now sulking up.

Nevertheless, no matter what the outcome was, he was going to accept it wholeheartedly, so long as his friendship with her never ended, he was okay.

***

By the time she got home, she quickly went to her room, ignoring the call from her friend and her auntie.

She just wanted to be alone and think to herself. The last thing she wanted was to tell them about what happened. Although she knew they were antic.i.p.ating it already.

As soon as she entered her room, she placed a call to the head maid, stating she did not want to be disturbed whatsoever by anyone.

After that, she quickly dialled Ye Cheng"s number. A part of her was already judging her as she cheated on him.,

She felt bad that had happened but she was also happy it did. It helped her better decide.

More than anything though, she wanted to hear from him and hope that it would calm her down listening to his voice.

RING! RING!

On the other hand, Ye Cheng had already lodged in a hotel and booked another flight back to his city. He decided there was no need to see her or even spending another day there.

His heart had been wounded and he felt it strongly. He had just finished calling his mother and trying to get her to calm down, stating that there was an important business issue that took his attention when she called in the afternoon and that was when Li Jing had put a call through to him.

He looked at his phone from where it was by his side on the bed and upon seeing her name he turned his face away.

"Finished your making out with your lover?" Ye Cheng mumbled to himself and continued watching the news.

The call ended and began to ring again. This time around he picked the phone up and turned the phone so that the screen was facing the bed, silencing the ringtone of the phone.

He was not in the mood to talk to her. He even preferred not seeing her call as her name just brought back the hurtful memory of watching someone else kissing her.

Ring! Ring!

The call came for the third time and this time, he stood up and walked over to the balcony, ignoring the call completely.

"Li Jing… Why does it hurt when I think about you? Why does my heart clench in pain when I recall? Why… Why did I let my heart be opened to you this way? Was this just all I was worth to you? I miss you but…It hurts, it hurts."

Slowly, he lowered his head and held it with his two hands as a sharp piercing cry fell out of his mouth.

While he felt so bad about everything, Li Jing"s heartbeat had started to increase just by thinking about what had happened.

She did not know why he called her earlier and now that she was trying to return the call he refused to pick.

"Is he still busy or what?" Li Jing asked herself and dropped her phone. To her, he may still busy with work and that was why he wasn"t answering.

Unknown to her, he saw what she wouldn"t have been seen. With her thoughts still, a bit scattered, Li Jing, looked over to her phone and saw the phone screen lit up.

It was Tang Zixin who was calling her. "h.e.l.lo," she answered after some second thought on picking the call.

"Hey, Li Jing. How are you?"

"I am okay. You?"

"Umm, I am alright. Have you gotten home, now?"

"Yeah, I am about to park my car in the parking lot. I just arrived."

"Wow, that was fast."

"Yeah but honestly I live about three streets away from yours," Tang Zixin informed her.

"Really?"

"Yeah. I hope you are good, honestly speaking. Tell me the truth."

"Truthfully, no, I am not."

"I could figure that out easily. It is the kiss right?" Tang Zixin asked her but Li Jing did not answer him back. "Li Jing, answer me. I am right, aren"t I?"

Li Jing did not know how she was going to answer his question. Honestly, things weren"t as simple anymore.

She was too scared of hurting him and breaking his heart to want to speak.

"Li Jing, please, I would appreciate it if you do not hide anything from me. Tell me the truth. I am the cause."

"Yes." The words felt like lead in her mouth after she said it.

"I know. I am sorry. I never meant to cause you any discomfort, Li Jing."

"I know."

"Yes you do, but it doesn"t change anything, does it?" Trang Zixin asked on her behalf. He could say he understood her a bit.

To many others they may not have counted it as anything but knowing her kind of person, she would. It would mean the world to her.

"Tang Zixin, I…" She paused. She was still considering telling him the truth or not.

"Be sincere with me, Li Jing. Tell me how you feel. Okay, let me make it easier for you. Do you have any feelings for me?" Tang Zixin questioned her. "And please I want to truth from you."

"Tang Zixin, I am sorry but I like you as a friend, a brother. A close friend I can talk to. I am sorry but my heart, I cannot love you as you want and return your feelings."

"It is okay. I understand."

"I am sorry, Tang Zixin."

"No need to apologize Li Jing. Please do not apologize. It is not your fault."

"But I hurt you."

"You did not hurt me, dear. I… No, this is all on me. I should have known better. One question though, why don"t you love me? Is your heart taken already?"

"I…yes."

"It is Ye Cheng, right?"

"Yes, it is him. I love him."

"Does he know?" Tang Zixin asked. He wanted to understand where she stood so that if he chooses to give her up, she had someone willing to accept her that she loved. But if there was none, he would fight back for her hand.

"No."

"Okay. I would back down because I respect your feelings. Once again I am sorry."

"It is okay, Tang Zixin. If there is anything, I hope today"s incident would not ruin our friendship?" She was now more concerned about her friendship with him as he was her second closest male friend.

She would hate for it to ruin what they managed to build together, that was why she asked him what she did.

"No, I won"t let that happen. You have my word. I would keep up with it. I am honoured that you still want to consider me as your friend, Li Jing."

"I am happy to have you as a friend."

"Good then. Please do have some rest and sleep early okay? I would call back to check up on you tomorrow. Do have a lovely night rest."

"Yeah, you too. Thanks so much for today."

"You"re welcome."