Chapter 15: Expressing Feelings

Translator: EndlessFantasy Translation Editor: EndlessFantasy Translation

Xu Lan placed the child on the table and poured a gla.s.s of water before sitting in front of him. He had so many uncertainties towards this child, but he did not have a choice.

“Bai Wu, lift up your head and look at me,” he instructed.

The child lifted his head up in astonishment, looking at him terrified as always. This was the first time he called out his name directly. However, under the circ.u.mstances, Bai Wu did not know whether he should be excited or worried.

“I told you, I will never abandon you. Do not mention it so easily ever again, do you hear me?”

Bai Wu paused for a second and nodded his head compliantly.

Xu Lan’s interrogative voice was not very amicable. The cattail leaf fan-like eyelashes still had teardrops on it, accentuating his fire-glazed eyes, making them appear crystal clear.

“I heard you,” Bai Wu answered with a pouty mouth.

After they went through so much and he confessed his true ident.i.ty, he knew that this man would not abandon him. He just did not want the man to be around the female reporter who looked like Song Xi.

“Also, don’t shed tears so frequently. You’re like a little girl. At your age, I was already the leader of the children from the whole village. I could punch whoever I want.”

Whenever he saw Bai Wu’s tears, he had a weird feeling in his heart and felt a little uncomfortable. Also, his senses abandoned him mercilessly just now, like how it deserted fools.

“Yes.” Bai Wu was still pouting his mouth, clearly showing his unhappiness.

Xu Lan felt annoyed. It was this young kid that started crying unreasonably, and he also a.s.sured him that he would not leave. How come he still had the expression on him as if he was seeking for solace? As if it was Xu Lan himself that made a mistake?

“You dislike the lady from this morning?”

Xu Lan asked this question without context. This little guy was always abandoned by others. The situation just now had probably occurred in the past, that was why he called out to him anxiously.

“Papa, do you like that lady?”

Bai Wu did not answer Xu Lan directly and asked him with a baby voice instead. A pair of eyes staring at him suddenly, desperate for answers.

“Ah? What?” Xu Lan was startled, scratched his ears and asked blankly.

“Papa likes that lady.”

This is not a question, but rather a statement. Bai Wu’s voice suddenly turned cold. He was angry at himself for stating the obvious truth.

“If Papa likes that lady, you will not like Bai Wu as much, but Bai Wu only likes Papa and will continue forever. Bai Wu likes Papa very very much.”

Xu Lan was thirty years old. He had everything and would have a child of his own in the future. He, on the other hand, was only three years old and had nothing. He only had Xu Lan!

When he spoke, his heart felt a strong sensation of sourness. He looked up at the man. Although his fiery eyes had already been covered by a layer of fog, his tears were held back by pure stubbornness, not letting them fall out.

“No, we just met for the first time today. How can I like her? What are you thinking in that mind of yours?”

His words made Xu Lan confused and puzzled as if he had to touch the head of a ten-feet monk — no one could reach it. He smilingly grazed Bai Wu’s nose with his hand and said it in a pampering manner.

It turned out to be that this little guy was worried that his status in Xu Lan’s heart might be demoted by others. The man felt so heart-warming from this little guy’s actions. This was the first time ever that he heard someone mentioned that they liked him. Moreover, it was his very own son.

“Papa!” Bai Wu took Xu Lan’s hand and threw himself into his arms.

“Papa, can you only like me? I do not want a mother, brother or sister. I just want Papa and to always be with you. I will only like Papa alone, so can Papa only like me as well?”

The little guy wrapped around his neck and asked softly in his ears.

“…” Xu Lan’s eyebrows wrinkled upon this request while he gently tapped on Bai Wu’s bottom.

“Papa! I want Papa to be with me! Only me! Papa, I like you.” Bai Wu sobbed and buried himself into Xu Lan’s neck, burning tears dropped into the notch on his neck.

He knew that his request was very unreasonable. However, whenever he thought of this man treating other women or children as nicely as he treated him or even more, he felt so sour. His tears also streamed down uncontrollably.

“Bai Wu, I cannot promise you this. You are still young…”

“Waaahhh!”

Bai Wu cried out after hearing this. In the past, he only shed huge droplets of tears quietly in an enamoring manner. This was Xu Lan’s first time hearing this child cry out loud. He immediately started to panic.

“Bai Wu, Bai Wu, don’t cry. Listen to me first…”

Xu Lan looked at Bai Wu, his heartbreaking cries made his heart ache. He used to feel annoyed at children’s cries, but his whole heart was left hanging upon hearing his cries.

“No! Hmph, Papa can only want me! Papa can only want me!” Bai Wu had a death grip on Xu Lan’s neck, repeating the words as he cried.

“Bai Wu! Stop messing around with these things. Shh—” Xu Lan tried to talk some sense into the child while stroking his back.

Seeing that the man did not agree with him, Bai Wu bit into his neck angrily. The man went into silence after a muted groan. Not before long, his mouth was filled with the taste of iron. It was the same iron taste that came from the house that night.

Bai Wu released him immediately and called out fearfully, “Papa.”

“Have you cooled down?” Xu Lan asked after giving a long sigh. He looked helplessly at the child that had bowed down and admitted to his mistakes but still trying very hard to glance at him.

“…Papa, can’t you just like Bai Wu?”

Bai Wu asked with such grievances. He saw blood was seeping out from the bite marks, bent down and used his tongue to lick around gently to clean it.

A jet of electricity struck downwards from the man’s neck and to his whole body, finally converging back to the area Bai Wu licked. Xu Lan suppressed the urge to press the child’s head further into the notch on his neck, took a deep breath, and said, “Child, Papa cannot promise you things like this. You have a long time to live. You will also experience many other things. Not only you but for me as well. We cannot be certain of anything. Nonetheless, I can promise you that Papa will always like you, love you, okay?”

When Xu Lan spoke, he could not imagine the mental image of his wife and son playing together. He could only feel the pain when he imagined how Bai Wu will leave him one day when he found his partner.

Oh right, he was still young. How could he tie him down around him? Xu Lan laughed bitterly, his face ravaged with grief.

Bai Wu stayed motionless in his embrace, tears streaming silently again. In the end, he apologized in a m.u.f.fled voice while holding on to the corner of his sleeves.

“Sorry, Papa,” he apologized for biting the man. He did not think that his request was excessive. On the contrary, he was still mad at the man.

“Okay, why did you cry again? We just agreed not to,” Xu Lan said dearly as he took out tissues to wipe away the tear stains on the child’s face.

“If I don’t cry, can Papa only like Bai Wu?” The child bit down his lips, popped his eyes open and went back to the same question.

“…” Xu Lan reached out to his pocket unconsciously. Xiao Li had not bought the cigarettes when he came in, the emptiness of the pocket made his heart felt empty as well.

“Papa, let’s go out. You still have things to do with that lady, right?” Bai Wu slid down from the table, opened the office door and walked out before Xu Lan could even register what was happening.