VOLUME 3

Chapter 6: Micchan’s (alias) Business Logbook (Part 1)

Tsukuyomi Shrine Business Logbook. Scribe: Micchan (alias).

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Month of **, Day &&. Cloudy, and then rainy.

–

Once again, the weather has been depressing since morning.

I’ve spent this entire day going around and seeing all my colleagues at the Tsukuyomi Shrine who had suffered grave injuries from the events of the other day.

Physical injuries could be healed with alterations or other techniques, but the spiritual injuries caused by ma.s.sive irregularities were much more serious and were the reason my colleagues were still bedridden.

The only two left unharmed were myself (being a bit special) and the head of the household, Tsukuyomi Ruza, who was a spiritualist of immense power. Also, I’ve heard he has been at least called a genius and a prodigy since childhood.

That head of the household has been holed up under the kotatsu (1) in our apartment since morning, and he has not moved for the entire day from that position.

Sometimes he changes the TV channel or munches on a potato chip, or he says something like “Ahhh, I really don’t want to work…”

I didn’t have much else to do, so I took this opportunity to record the household head’s words.

Statistically, the three things he says the most are “I don’t want to work,” “I don’t want to try,” and “I want to die.” Of those, he has said “I don’t want to work” 132 times, “I don’t want to try” 1032 times, and it is impossible to count how many times he has said “I want to die.”

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Month of **, Day %%. Heavy rain.

–

The rain is still pouring, making it impossible to do laundry.

The head of the household seemed to have realized that I’ve been recording his statements, and more variety has popped up in his speech patterns.

He has also started saying things like “I think people who try are people who lose,” and “I’m only human, so it’s okay if I don’t try.”

If that was all, I would’ve been able to ignore all this as the ravings of an idiot, but each time he says something he looks at me with this proud look on his face. I could feel my irritation growing, until I finally snapped.

I felt my mind go pure white, and when I came to, a few hours had pa.s.sed. I also noticed that the household head was now kneeling prostrate in front of me, completely naked.

The household head suddenly went from calling me “Micchan” (alias) to “Mii-sama” (alias).

He should know my real name, so why was he calling me by an alias anyways?

I pointed this out to him, at which point he started saying “I humbly apologize, Master.”

Exactly how am I supposed to react when a middle-aged man, who is not only my employer but also my foster parent, starts calling me “Master”?

That night, while we slept with our futons lined up next to each other, I heard him begin talking in his sleep. “Sob… hic… I’m so lonely, Juju-chan… let me put my head on your lap while you stroke my head…” he said.

From that, I deduced that his usual archaic way of speaking was just an act.

I had to do something quick about this useless person… I suppose that with the everyday ch.o.r.es around the shrine being handled by priestesses like me, and with Juju-sama doing most of the real work all by herself, the house head has developed quite a habit of laziness.

Even though his daughter Sasami-sama had been such a serious, hard-working person…

Aren’t you happy, Sasami-sama?

Happy that you came out more like your mother.

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Month of **, Day ##. Clear skies, but high tide. (2)

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Today was my birthday.

The head of the household gave me a collar. Was this supposed to be a birthday present?

The name of the household head was engraved into the collar.

The household head then began pretending to be a dog while completely naked. I felt a hard-to-describe feeling welling up within me. This led to my mind going completely white again, and when I came to, the household head was

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Juju-sama, Sasami-sama, I don’t care which one of you it is, but can someone please come back.

Micchan (alias) is already at her limit.

TRANSLATOR’S NOTES

(1) Heated table. Very comfy.

(2) This is apparently in reference to a description of battle conditions during the Russo-j.a.panese war, made by Akiyama Saneyuki.