Shorty McCabe

Chapter 24

"Where"s Buddy now?" says I.

"Locked in my clothes-closet, with his hands tied and a gag in his mouth," says she. "Oh, I can handle him that way, big as he is; and I wasn"t going to take any more chances. But it"s likely that Mrs. Pell has missed her ring by this time and is raising a howl about it. What"s to be done?"

Say, there was a proposition for you! And me just a plain, every-day mitt juggler that don"t take thinkin" exercises reg"lar. "Guess you"ve pushed the wrong b.u.t.ton this time, Sadie," says I. "But I"ll stay in your corner till the lights go out. Is anyone else on?"

"Not a soul," says Sadie.

"That"s some help," says I. "First we"ll have a little talk with Buddy."

I couldn"t see what good that would do, but it was up to me to make some kind of a move.

When they"d landed us under the porte cochere--yes, you"d call it stoppin" at the horse-block--I sails in like I"d come alone, and hunts up Pinckney.

"What"s all this about me bein" needed up here?" says I. "Goin" to make me Queen of the May?"

"By Jove, Shorty!" says he, "that"s a clever idea. We"ll do it."

"Yes, you will--not," says I. "You"ll cut it out. I ain"t no wine agent, and I left me rag doll to home; so if there"s any funny stunts expected, you tell "em I"ve put on a sub. Oh, sure, I"ll stay to dinner, but as for leadin" any cotillions, change the card."

He gave his word they wouldn"t spring anything like that on me, and then he called up a waiter in knee pants, and had him show me up to my quarters so I could get me gas-light clothes on before they unlocked the dinin"-room doors. After I"d made a quick shift I slid over into the next wing, followin" directions, and found Sadie.

"Mrs. Pell"s on the war-path already," says she. "She"s having it out with her maid now. Come in."

She"d dug Buddy out of the wardrobe and had him propped up in a corner.

"Better unstopper him and take off the bandages," says I.

And say, he had a lot of language corked up inside of him. It wasn"t very sisterly, either, and most of it would have sounded better at a race-track; but I shut the transom and motioned to Sadie to let him spiel away, never chippin" in a word, only standing one side and lookin"

him over.

So far as the outside went he was a credit to the family--one of these slim clean-cut youngsters, with a lot of curly red hair, pinky-white cheeks, and a pair of blue eyes that had nine kinds of deviltry in "em.

I could figure out how mother might be able not to see anything but good in Buddy. Hanged if I could get very sore on him myself, and knowin" how he"d been cuttin" up, at that.

"Well," says I, when he"d got out of breath some, "feel any better, do you?"

"Huh!" says he, givin" me a squint sideways. "Some cheap skate of a private detective, eh! You can"t throw a scare into me that way, sis.

Chase him out."

"Buddy," says I, "give up the rings."

"How"d you know there was more than one?" says he.

"Give up," says I, holdin" out me hand.

He did it, like a little man. There was two besides the marquise; one an emerald as big as a lima bean, and the other a solitaire spark that could have been shoved up for three or four hundred. You see, a woman like Mrs. Purdy Pell generally has a collection of those things lyin"

around on her dressin"-table, and; knew if Buddy"d got any, he"d made a haul.

"I"m ashamed of you, Buddy," says I.

"You needn"t be," says he. "I guess you"d do the same if you had a sister that wanted to see you starve in the streets. Oh, you needn"t screw up your eyebrows, Sadie. It"s so. And if you don"t cough up a thousand and let me go, I"ll swipe anything in sight. I can stand being pinched if you can afford to have me."

Sadie threw up her hands at that, and began walkin" up and down the room. "Do you hear that?" says she. "That"s the kind of a brother I"ve got."

"It"s something awful," says I. "Just hearin" him talk makes me feel shivery. It beats the band how wicked some of these cigarette desperados do get. Don"t, Buddy, or I"ll faint. I wouldn"t dare stay in the room if your sister wa"n"t handy to tie you up again in case you started to cut loose."

"I"ve got a good notion to push in your face," says he.

"Don"t pay any attention to him, Shorty," says Sadie.

"I won"t," says I; "but I"m scared stiff."

Just about then, though, Buddy seemed to have got a bulletin over a special wire. He was gazin" at me with his mouth open and a pucker between his eyes. "What Shorty?" says he. "Say, you ain"t Shorty McCabe, are you?"

"Not to you," says I. "I got to draw the line somewhere, and with bad men I stands on my dignity. I"m Professor McCabe, sonny."

"Holy cats!" says he. "Honest, professor, I didn"t mean a word of it. I take it all back. Why say, I saw you put out the Kangaroo in two rounds."

"Then you"ve had a liberal education," says I.

"Gee!" says he, lettin" off some more surprise, and bracin" himself back in the chair like he was afraid of falling off.

Well say, I"ve been rode to my dressin"-room on shoulders, and welcomed home from fights by mobs with bra.s.s bands; but for a gen-u-ine ovation I guess Buddy"s little stunt came as near bein" the real thing as any.

Dewey comin" back from the Philippines, or Mr. Get-There Hadley landin"

in St. Louis with the Standard Oil scalps, wa"n"t in it with me bein"

discovered by Buddy Sullivan. I couldn"t get the key to it then, but I"ve mapped it out now. Most of his enthusiasm was owin" to the fact that ever since he was fifteen Buddy"d based his claim to bein" a real sport on my havin" come from the same block as he did.

Anyway, it was a lightnin" change. From being a holy terror, Buddy calmed down to as peaceful a young gent as you"d want to meet. If I"d just shake hands with him once and call it square, he"d follow any program I"d a mind to plan out.

"Only don"t let her send me home to maw," says he. "Say, they get up at six in the morning there, and if I don"t crawl down by seven maw lugs up toast and eggs, and talks to me like I was a kid."

"Well, where"d you like to be shipped?" says I.

"Aw, come now, professor," says he. "You don"t have to be told that.

There ain"t but one place where a fellow like me can really live. You get sis to put me back on Broadway with a few hundred in my clothes, and I"ll kiss the Book that she won"t hear from me for a year."

"But how about this jewelry-collectin" fad of yours?" says I.

"Ah, I wasn"t going to carry it off," says he. "I let her see I had it, on purpose. I"ll be good."

Well, Sadie was willin" to let it go at that, and we was just gettin"

this part of the mix-up straightened out lovely, when there came a rap at the door.

"Quick," says Sadie. "They mustn"t see Buddy or you either, Shorty!"

So Buddy was pushed into the closet again, and I dodges behind a tall dressin"-mirror in the corner. It was a red-eyed girl with lumps in her throat. She said she was Mrs. Purdy Pell"s maid.

"Mrs. Pell"s missed some rings," says she, "and we"ve been havin" words over it. I told her there was a suspicious-looking young man in the house that I"d seen comin" out of your rooms awhile ago, and I didn"t know but what you"d missed some things, too, ma"am."