Speak Bird, Speak Again

Chapter 17

Clever Hasan went right in, and did as the ghoul had told him. He fixed the door, switched the meat and the barley, put the empty pitcher down, picked up the full one, turned his back, and came straight out.

"Trap him, O gate!" shouted the devils.

"It"s been forty years since I"ve been opened!" came the answer.

"Catch him, O hounds!"

"It"s been forty years since we"ve tasted meat!"



"Hold him, O horses!"

"It"s been forty years since we"ve tasted barley!"

Meanwhile, Hasan ran until he reached the ghoul, who put him on his shoulders and flew off.

"Welcome!" said the ghouleh when they arrived. "Allah be praised for your safety!"

"Who"s going to take him back to his uncle?" they asked among themselves.

"I"ll complete the favor I did him," volunteered the youngest, "by taking him back to his uncle."

Taking him on his shoulders, the ghoul flew back with him to his uncle.

"Here"s your horse back? said the big ghoul.

"Yes," said Hasan, bidding him good-bye. He then mounted his horse and moved on.

On his way back to his mother, the king"s daughter saw him from her balcony.

"Clever Hasan!" she called out. "Stop here awhile?

"No," he said, "I don"t want to stop."

"By my father"s head," she swore, "and by Allah, who gives him power over other people"s heads, if you don"t stop by I"ll have yours cut off!."

Hasan came over to see her. Now, she was clever and took away the pitcher with the water of life, giving him one full of ordinary water in its place. She then fed him lunch and sent him on his way. He went straight to his mother and knocked on the door.

"O despair!" the mother cried out when he knocked. "Here he is, still alive, O Slave of Blessing!"

"By Allah," the giant exclaimed, "I have no idea how he could have come back."

"Welcome back, son!" she said. "Allah be praised for your safety?

She kissed him, taking away the pitcher. "And now," they said to each other, "What are we going to do?"

"Ask him where his strength lies," suggested the giant.

"O Clever Hasan, my son," she asked him one day, "where does your strength lie?"

"On my head are seven hairs," he answered. "If you cut them, all my power will be gone,"

"Come here," she said, "and let me remove the lice from your hair."

She sat down to delouse him and pulled the seven hairs from his head. When she gave him a bit of thread, he did not have the strength to break it.

"O Slave of Blessing!" she called out. "Come over and cut off his head!"

"No, mother? begged Hasan. "I"m your son!"

"Never!" said the mother. "Cut off his head!"

They chopped off his head, gouged out his eyes, and cut his body into four pieces, which they put in a box that they threw into the sea. The following day some fishermen found a box that had been washed ash.o.r.e by the waves. "By Allah," they said, "this will make a good present for the king"s daughter. We"re going to present it to her."

Taking the box with them, they came to the daughter of the king, and the moment she saw them, she knew. "Alas!" cried she, "Oh! What a loss, Clever Hasan!" She took him from the fishermen, giving them ten dinars and sending them on their way. "So! Your mother did you in!" she said to him, opening the box. "How much did I advise you, but you didn"t listen!"

With the water of life at hand, she connected the foot to the leg and rubbed them with the water, and (Allah granting the power) it healed. She then connected the arms, the back, and the shoulders. Lastly, she placed the head in place and rubbed it with the water, and behold! he sneezed.

"Where am I?" he asked.

"You"re with me, O Clever Hasan," she answered. "Where are your eyes?"

"They gouged them out before they slaughtered me. My little brother has them."

"Don"t worry!" she said, and set about feeding him broth of squab and chicken every day. She fed him these nutritious broths daily until he grew as strong as a camel.

"I"m going back to kill the giant," he announced.

"And how are you going to kill him?" she asked. "First you must get your eyes back. Take some trinkets with you and call out, "Bracelets, O girls! Rings, O girls!" Your brothers will come out and ask how much you want for them. Say you don"t want money, you want eyes. What"s in your left hand for the left eye."

Hasan did as she advised him. "Ah! Yes!" his little brother piped up. "By Allah, my brother"s eyes are on the window sill. Wait till I get them for you." Taking the eyes with him, Hasan threw down all his trinkets, saying, "On your way now!"

When he had come back, the king"s daughter put his eyes back in place and he became better than before, even more youthful than he had been. Having got his eyesight and his strength back, he said to the king"s daughter, "I"m going over to kill them one by one."

"O my sweetheart, my soul!" she pleaded with him. She nearly died begging him to stay. "Never!" he said, mounting his horse. Taking his sword with him, he headed straight for the door and knocked.

"Who is it?"

"I"m Clever Hasan!" he announced.

"Yee!" she screamed, "It"s the death of me!"

"You didn"t say that when you had me slaughtered," said her son. "You had me quartered. But by Allah, I"m going to tear you to pieces - you and your Slave of Blessing? First he cut the giant"s throat over her knee, then he slaughtered the two boys and the girl and tore them to pieces in front of her. "As for you," he said, "I"m not only going to kill you, I"m going to tear you to shreds. I bring you here whole and hearty, and you betray me by marrying the slave whose legs I cut off!"

He tore her apart and threw the pieces away. Then he demolished the palace and took all the giant"s treasure, sending it to the king"s daughter.

One day the king asked his daughter, "Don"t you want to get married?"

"Yes, father, I do," she answered. "Let it be known in town that I want to get married."

It was made public that the king"s daughter was ready to marry, and the notables - the viziers, the pashas, and the beys - came pa.s.sing under her window, expecting her to choose one of them by tossing an apple over his head, but it was no use.

Meanwhile, Clever Hasan put on a tattered sackcloth. He had also got hold of a sheep"s stomach, which he had ripped open and put on his head. He then came and walked under the window of the king"s daughter"s palace. Recognizing him, she threw the apple down over his head.

"Yee! What shame!" some exclaimed. "What a disaster!" said others. Each had her own words, and the father refused. He did not want to give her to him.

"Never!" she insisted. "I won"t take another!"

"If you must marry him," he said, "you"ll marry him in the house of desertion."

"Fine," she said. "I accept."

They were married and lived together in isolation. Time pa.s.sed, and her father was at war. Clever Hasan had an old, worn-out mule, and when the war started he rode it into battle. "Ha! Ha!" he egged his mule on, and people abused him, spitting on him and cursing: "d.a.m.n your father and his father who took you for a son-in-law by giving you his daughter!"

When he had left these people behind and there was no one around to see him, he brought out his magic ring.

"Magic ring!" he called out.

"Your servant at your command!" came the answer.

"I want a green mare the like of which has never been seen, and I want a gold-plated sword."

Immediately, a green mare appeared, a green suit of armor, and a golden sword. He went down to battle, and - slit! slit - he slit throats till sunset. A third of the enemy was destroyed. On his way back to town, riding his mule and wearing his tattered clothes, whoever saw him spat on him.

The next day he went to battle, and again people were cursing him and spitting on him as he pa.s.sed through. When he had gone some distance and there was no one around to say "There is no G.o.d but G.o.d!" he dismounted from his mule.

"Magic ring? he called out.

"Your fortune"s at your fingertips!" came the answer.

"I want a red mare, a red suit, and a gold-plated sword."

Down to battle he went, and - slit! slit! - he cut throats until another third of the enemy was gone. Pulling himself together, he went home as people spat on him.

On the third day he mounted his mule and came down, and when he reached a deserted spot, out came the ring.

"Magic ring!"

"Your fortune"s at your fingertips?

"I want a white suit, a white mare, and a sword that will give me the upper hand in battle."

"Fine. Right away!"

Clever Hasan came down to the field of battle. Meanwhile, the king, hearing about the knight who came and killed a third of the enemy every day, said, "By Allah, I want to go and see the knight about whom the people have been talking."

Clever Hasan came down to the battleground, killed the remaining third, and went back home riding the white mare. When people saw him and realized who it was they had been spitting on, they thought something strange was going on and went to speak to the king about it. When the king saw Hasan, he was overwhelmed.

"Your husband," he asked his daughter," what"s his name?"

"His name," she answered, "is Clever Hasan, the son of King So-and-So."

"You married the son of King So-and-So!"

"Yes."

The king came forward and embraced Hasan, saying, "I"m really sorry, dear son-in-law?

He had it announced in town that there was to be a feast of seven days and seven nights to celebrate the marriage of Clever Hasan to his daughter. The townspeople were invited to feast for the whole week at the king"s expense, in celebration of Clever Hasan"s wedding.

And may every year find you in good health!

The Cricket

TELLER: Testify that G.o.d is One!

AUDIENCE: There is no G.o.d but G.o.d.

Once there was a woman who could not get pregnant and have children. One day she cried out, "O Lord, would you grant me a little girl, even if she"s nothing more than a cricket!" It so happened that Allah heard her plea, and she became pregnant and gave birth to a cricket. A day went and a day came, and the cricket grew up. Once upon a day she wanted to get married.

"Mama," she said, going to her mother, "I want to get married."

"What can I do for you?" asked the mother. "You must look for a bridegroom as small as you are."

The cricket went away, and came upon a camel.

"Ba! Ba!" said he. "Will you marry me?"

She answered: "Cricket, cricket, your mother!

And you are cousin to the wh.o.r.e.

I"ll put the gold in my sleeve, And talk to my mother some more."

"O mama!" she said to her mother. "His eyes are very big, his head is very big, and his ears are very big. All of him is very big."