The Foolish Dictionary

Chapter 10

=FOOTBALL= A clever subterfuge for carrying on prize-fights under the guise of a reputable game.

=FOREIGNER=

[Ill.u.s.tration]

One who is eligible to the police force. From Grk. _fero_, to carry off, and _enara_, spoils. One who carries off the spoils.

=FORBEARANCE= The spirit of toleration shown when a man who knows, patiently listens to a fool who does not.

=FRANC= Twenty cents, in French.

=FRANKFURTERS= Four for twenty, in German. Derived from _frank_, open, and _fort.i.tude_, meaning brave. Sold in the open and eaten by the brave.

=FROST= An old flame after the engagement is broken off.

=FUN= Joy.

=FUNCTION= Devoid of joy.

As ye sew, so shall ye rip.

G

Money makes the mayor go.--_Proverbs of Politics._

=GALLON= From the Fr. _galonner_, to make tight. Note, one is sufficient.

=GALLANTRY= This word is now almost obsolete. It was formerly employed to express a deferential attention on the part of the man who in a crowded car gave up his seat to the ladies.

=GAMBLER= From the Grk. _gumnos_, stripped to the skin. And the gambler"s the one that does it.

=GARDEN= From the Fr. _garantir_, to make good. Hence, a place where lovers make good.

=GARLIC= From Grk. _gar_, for, and Lat. _liceor_, to bid. Good for the biddies.

=GEM= A breakfast m.u.f.fin. With the newly married, syn. for "a precious stone."

=GERM= A bit of animal life living in water.

=GERMAN=

[Ill.u.s.tration]

More animal life, living on beer.

=GIRAFFE= The champion rubber-neck of the world, and the longest thirst on record.

=GLOBE= An all-round proposition which has furnished its shareholders a living for several thousand years, though its stock is two-thirds water.

=GOAT= The honored founder and oldest inhabitant of Harlem, N.Y.

Elsewhere, not in good odor.

=GOLF= An excuse for carrying unconcealed weapons and a Scotch breath.

=GONDOLA= A pleasure craft which plies in Venice, at World"s Fairs and other popular watering places. From Eng. _gone_, and Lat.

_dolor_, sadness, or Eng. _dollar_. Sadness gone; also, a gone dollar.