The House of Torchy

Chapter 16

"Then," says Vee, sort of draggy, "I--I suppose Mrs. Foote is right.

It"s too bad, for that Mrs. Tupper did seem such a friendly old soul.

And I shall feel so sn.o.bbish if I don"t return her call."

"Huh!" says I. "I don"t see why Mrs. Pemmy couldn"t let you find out about her for yourself. Even if the old girl don"t belong, what"s the use bein" so rough with her?"

"Do you know, Torchy," says Vee, "I felt that way about it when Mrs.

Foote was snubbing her. And yet--well, I wish I knew just what to do."

"Clean out of my line," says I.

I expect it was the roses that set me mullin" the case over again. They was sent over for Vee a couple of days later--half a dozen great busters, like young cabbages, with stems a yard long. They come with the compliments of Mrs. Ben Tupper.

"I simply couldn"t send them back," says Vee; "and yet----"

"I get you," says I. "But don"t worry. Let the thing ride a while. I got an idea."

It wasn"t anything staggerin". It had just struck me that if Vee had to hand out any social smears she ought to do it on her own dope, and not accordin" to Mrs. Pemmy Foote"s say-so. Which is why I begins pumpin"

information out of anybody that came handy. Goin" into town next mornin", I tackled three or four on the 8:03 in an offhand way.

Oh, yes, the Ben Tuppers! Business of hunchin" the shoulders. No, they didn"t belong to the Country Club, nor the Hunt a.s.sociation, nor figure on the Library or Hospital boards, or anything else. In fact, they don"t mingle much. Hadn"t made the grade. Barred? We-e-ell, in a way, perhaps.

Why? Oh, there was Mrs. Ben. Wasn"t she enough? An ex-actress with two or three hubbys in the discard! Could she expect people to swallow that?

Only one gent, though, had anything definite to offer. He"s a middle-aged sport that seems to make a specialty of wearin" checked suits and yellow gloves. He chuckles when I mentions Mrs. Tupper.

"Grand old girl, Clara Belle," says he.

"Eh?" says I. "Shoot the rest."

"Couldn"t think of it, son," says he. "You"re too young. But in my day Clara Belle Kinney was some queen."

And that"s all I can get out of him except more chuckles. I files away the name, though; and that afternoon, while we was waitin" for a quorum of directors to straggle into the General Offices, I springs it on Old Hickory.

"Mr. Ellins," says I, "did you ever know of a Clara Belle Kinney?"

"Wha-a-at?" he gasps, almost swallowin" his cigar. "Listen to that, Mason. Here"s a young innocent asking if we ever knew Clara Belle Kinney. Did we?"

And old K. W. Mason, what does he do but throw back his shiny dome, open his mouth, and roar out:

"Yure right fut is crazy, Yure left fut is lazy, But if ye"ll be aisy I"ll teach ye to waltz!"

After which them two old cut-ups wink at each other rakish and slap their knees. All of which ain"t so illuminatin". But they keep on, mentionin" Koster Bial"s and the Cork Room, until I can patch together quite a sketch of Mrs. Tupper"s early career.

Seems she"d made her first hit in this old-time concert-hall when she was a sweet young thing in her teens. One of her naughty stunts was kickin" her slipper into an upper box, and gettin" it tossed back with a mash note in it, or maybe a twenty-dollar bill. Then she"d graduated into comic opera.

"Was there ever a Katishaw like her?" demands Old Hickory of K. W., who responds by hummin" husky:

"I dote upon a tiger From the Congo or the Niger, Especially when lashing of his tail."

And, while they don"t go into details, I gathered that they"d been Clara Belle fans--had sent her orchids on openin" nights, and maybe had set up wine suppers for her and her friends. They knew about a couple of her matrimonial splurges. One was with her manager, of course; the next was a young broker whose fam"ly got him to break it off. After that they"d lost track of her.

"It seems to me," says Old Hickory, "that I heard she had married someone in Buffalo, or Rochester, and had quit the stage. A patent medicine chap, I think he was, who"d made a lot of money out of something or other. I wonder what has become of her?"

That was my cue, all right, but I pa.s.ses it up. I wasn"t talkin" just then; I was listenin".

"Ah-h-h!" goes on Mr. Mason, foldin" his hands over his forward sponson and rollin" his eyes sentimental. "Dear Clara Belle! I say, Ellins, wouldn"t you like to hear her sing that MacFadden song once more?"

"I"d give fifty dollars," says Old Hickory.

"I"d make it a hundred if she"d follow it with "O Promise Me,"" says K.

W. "What was her record--six hundred nights on Broadway, wasn"t it?"

Say, they went on reminiscin" so long, it"s a wonder the monthly meetin"

ever got started at all. I might have forgot them hot-air bids of theirs, too, if it hadn"t been for something Vee announces that night across the dinner-table.

Seems that Mrs. Robert Ellins had been rung into managin" one of these war benefit stunts, and she"s decided to use their new east terrace for an outdoor stage and the big drawin"-room it opens off from as an auditorium. You know, Mrs. Robert used to give violin recitals and do concert work herself, so she ain"t satisfied with amateur talent.

Besides, she knows so many professional people.

"And who do you think she is to have on the program?" demands Vee.

"Farrar!"

"Aw, come!" says I.

"And perhaps Mischa Elman," adds Vee. "Isn"t that thrilling?"

I admits that it is.

"But say," I goes on, "with them big names on the bill, what does she expect to tax people for the best seats?"

Vee says how they"d figured they might ask ten dollars for a few choice chairs.

"Huh!" says I. "That won"t get you far. Why don"t you soak "em proper?"

"But how?" asks Vee.

"You put in a bald-headed row," says I, "and I"ll find you a party who"ll fill it at a hundred a throw."

Vee stares at me like she thought I"d been touched with the heat, and wants to know who.

"Clara Belle Kinney," says I.

"Why, I never heard of any such person," says she.

"Oh, yes, you have," says I. "Alias Mrs. Ben Tupper."

Course, I had some job convincin" her I wasn"t joshin"; and even after I"d sketched out the whole story, and showed her that Clara Belle"s past wasn"t anything to really shudder over, Vee is still doubtful.

"But can she sing now?" she asks.