The Woman Who Accepted Her Fate Chapter 15: Unable to Return the Favor

When Xiaodi thought of the many years of been treated very well by Yonggang and as she saw Yonggang"s despair plus that they might not ever be together, she could not bear to continue thinking further about it. She wanted to turn away from all her burdens. Xiaodi looked through all her clothes and placed some into a pouch. She began to restlessly wait for night to arrive.

Xiaodi did not know whether she was nervous or excited, but she was a bit fl.u.s.tered from hoping that the day would quickly end and was also a bit scared when the time really came. This result in Xiaodi"s state of mind to be on tenterhooks and also very much ill-at-ease.

During dinner, she only ate two spoons. Her father could no longer hold back and finally asked, "Xiaodi ah, during the day, why did Yonggang came looking for you? I got this feeling that after he came, your entire person seemed to change?"

Although Xiaodi"s mother was blind, she still clearly understood Xiaodi"s difficulty. She remorsefully said, "Xiaodi, mummy knows that you grew up with Yonggang since young and both your relationship are good! Now you are going to marry someone else, do you blame me? It"s all because daddy and mummy are incapable and thus implicated you. Mummy has let you down!"

Xiaomei could not bear to hear any longer as he felt even more ashamed, "Little sister, there"s no need for you to marry Fengying"s father. I"m not getting married, so you can be with Yonggang! I can see that he really loves you! Also, his studies are good so he will have good future prospect. If you are together with him, you will be blissful! You do not need to worry about us!"

Originally, Xiaodi wanted to elope with Yonggang under the cover of the night, but after hearing her parents and brother"s words, she did not have the heart to leave them. Xiaodi decided to harden her heart. Yonggang still got a few more years before graduating from studying, so during the time he would be in the city, he would be able to meet many better girls. How would he be willing to marry a rustic person who is both poor and uneducated?

In the end, Xiaomei would miss his chance to get married. Wouldn"t she regret her choice for her whole life? It was still her parents and brother"s problem which were more important and it wasn"t important on who she marry!

When she think like this, her heart became free from anxiety. She quickly wrote in a piece of paper: Brother Yonggang, I"m sorry, I still could not leave with you.

As Xiaodi knew that her brother is illiterate, she pulled her brother outside the door and gave the paper to him, while telling him, "Brother, help me to secretly give this paper to Yonggang. n.o.body should know about this. After that, don"t say anything and come back."

Watching Xiaomei silently walked in the direction of the neighbor"s house, tears gushed out of Xiaodi"s eyes. She was crying for herself and for betraying Yonggang. Her heart was as if there was a knife cut, very painful!

For the next few days, the person her heart could not let go was Yonggang. She heard that the following days after that day, Yonggang did not go to school. His parents were shocked as they did not know what the problem was. Fortunately, after two days, Yonggang carried his bag and went to school.

Xiaodi clearly knew that Yonggang"s sadness was due to her. She didn"t know how to face him or even comfort him. She wanted him to completely forget about her so that he could concentrate on his studies and be admitted to a good university. Like this, her heart might at least feels better.

It was Sunday, Xiaodi saw that her neighbors had gone out and only Yonggang was left. She suddenly wanted to see him. Thinking about the past when Yonggang had treated her very well but she had cruelly left him to marry someone else. She didn"t know how to repay him.

As Xiaodi racked her brain, she suddenly thought of something: she only had her body!

Momentarily, Xiaodi set her mind. She wanted to use her body to repay Yonggang"s many years of kindness towards her. She mustered her courage and directly walked towards the familiar residence. Like a brave warrior, she unhesitantly opened the door and locked it after entering.

In the house, Yonggang was lying on his bed and was looking at the ceiling. He seemed to be thinking about something. Xiaodi had been quietly standing behind Yonggang"s head for nearly two minutes. Yonggang suddenly felt that there was another person in the house and he hurriedly raised his head to look around. What he saw was none other than his beloved person who he dearly missed.

His reaction was like he just woke up from his dream as he immediately sat up before jumping down the bed barefooted. He felt slightly happy from this unbelievable meeting. He held onto Xiaodi"s shoulders and questioned with a hoa.r.s.e voice, "Xiaodi, it"s really you? I miss you! Have you finally decided to be together with me? Is this correct?"

Both of Xiaodi"s eyes were red. She looked at Yonggang with a sad smile before beginning to undress her clothes until she was in her birthday suit. Previously, she and Yonggang never had any intimate skinship. They at most only held each other hands and hug a bit. They had never kissed before.

Xiaodi was feeling very bashful as her white skin began to flush red, making her even more seductive. At this time, Yonggang"s brain was blanked and his response became sluggish. Only his heavy breathing could be heard. He had never experienced this sort of situation. Blood rushed straight to his head as his whole body stiffened.

At this point, even though Xiaodi was shy, she had already set her mind to do it, so she would carry it through. At any rate, she had let Yonggang down and she was unable to repay his goodwill. Also, she did not have anything worthy enough to give as repayment. Hence, she decided to simply just gave her body to him.

Following what she had learnt from the tv, she approached Yonggang and embraced him with both her arms around his neck. She followed by kissing Yonggang, though it was done a bit clumsily. Yonggang at this time was unable to restrain himself and he too hugged Xiaodi and became immersed in sucking her sweet little mouth.

……Omitting a thousand words……

As Yonggang and Xiaodi"s bodies parted, he got an unspeakable feeling which was both mysterious and desirable……

To Xiaodi, apart from being nervous, she felt that there was an unspeakable pain and indescribable happiness. Like this, she felt that her heart had become more magnanimous and at least she now didn"t feel so overly guilty to Yonggang as she had given her first time to him.

After Xiaodi had dressed and was getting ready to leave Yonggang"s home, Yonggang tightly hugged her, "Xiaodi I love you! Have you decided to leave with me? Let"s leave tonight, alright? I will definitely give you happiness!"

Xiaodi lowered her head and said softly, "Yonggang, I"m sorry! I can"t leave with you. If I leave, my parents and brother will be done for. I could not bear to leave them and disregard them!"

"Why? What are you saying?" Yonggang cried out, "Since you have decided to not be together with me, why did you excite me again? Is it because you felt that you did not hurt me deep enough and my suffering wasn’t enough? What"s the meaning of this? What do you see me as?"

When Yonggang heard that Xiaodi said that she could not be together with her, he exploded with rage. Of course, he only looked from his own perspective and did not bother to think about Xiaodi"s pain and helplessness. Even more, since he had not calmed down, he did not think of what Xiaodi had done for him. Maybe different people really think things differently and are never the same?

Xiaodi felt somewhat hurt and was despaired. She did not blame Yonggang but herself. Why did she not thought from Yongang"s standpoint? Was it that this time she had done something wrong? Was it that Yonggang was not able to free himself from their relationship because his love for her was too deep? Did she just hurt him?