Vice Versa

Chapter 15

The Miss Mutlows sat stiffly down on a form, one on each side of her governess, and all three stared solemnly at the boys, who began to blush vividly under the inspection, to unb.u.t.ton and reb.u.t.ton their gloves with great care, and to shift from leg to leg in an embarra.s.sed manner.

Dulcie soon singled out poor Mr. Bult.i.tude, who, mindful of Tipping"s warning, was doing his very best to avoid her.

She ran straight to him, laid her hand on his arm and looked into his face pleadingly. "d.i.c.k," she said, "you"re not sulky still, are you?"

Mr. Bult.i.tude had borne a good deal already, and, not being remarkably sweet-natured, he shook the little hand away, half petulant and half alarmed. "I do wish you wouldn"t do this sort of thing in public. You"ll compromise me, you know!" he said nervously.

Dulcie opened her grey eyes wide, and then a flush came into her cheeks, and she made a little disdainful upward movement of her chin.

"You didn"t mind it once," she said. "I thought you might want to dance with me. You liked to last term. But I"m sure I don"t care if you choose to be disagreeable. Go and dance with Mary Mutlow if you want to, though you did say she danced like a pair of compa.s.ses, and I shall tell her you said so, too. And you know you"re not a good dancer yourself. _Are_ you going to dance with Mary?"

Paul stamped. "I tell you I never dance," he said. "I can"t dance any more than a lamp-post. You don"t seem an ill-natured little girl, but why on earth can"t you let me alone?"

Dulcie"s eyes flashed. "You"re a nasty sulky boy," she said in an angry undertone (all the conversation had, of course, been carried on in whispers). "I"ll never speak to you or look at you again. You"re the most horrid boy in the school--and the ugliest!"

And she turned proudly away, though anyone who looked might have seen the fire in her eyes extinguished as she did so. Perhaps Tipping did see it, for he scowled at them from his corner.

There was another sound outside, as of fiddlestrings being tw.a.n.ged by the finger, and, as the boys hastily formed up in two lines down the centre of the room and the Miss Mutlows and Dulcie prepared themselves for the curtsey of state, there came in a little fat man, with mutton-chop whiskers and a white face, upon which was written an unalterable conviction that his manner and deportment were perfection itself.

The two rows of boys bent themselves stiffly from the back, and Mr.

Burdekin returned the compliment by an inclusive and stately inclination.

"Good afternoon, madam. Young ladies, I trust I find you well. (The curtsey just a leetle lower, Miss Mutlow--the right foot less drawn back. Beautiful! Feet closer at the recovery. Perfect!) Young gentlemen, good evening. Take your usual places, please, all of you, for our preliminary exercises. Now, the _cha.s.see_ round the room. Will you lead off, please, Dummer; the hands just lightly touching the shoulders, the head thrown negligently back to balance the figure; the whole deportment easy, but not careless. Now, please!"

And, talking all the time with a metrical fluency, he sc.r.a.ped a little jig on the violin, while Dummer led off a procession which solemnly capered round the room in sundry stages of conscious awkwardness. Mr.

Bult.i.tude shuffled along somehow after the rest, with rebellion at his heart and a deep sense of degradation. "If my clerks were to see me now!" he thought.

After some minutes of this, Mr. Burdekin stopped them and directed sets to be formed for "The Lancers."

"Bult.i.tude," said Mr. Burdekin, "you will take Miss Mutlow, please."

"Thank you," said Paul, "but--ah--I don"t dance."

"Nonsense, nonsense, sir, you are one of my most promising pupils. You mustn"t tell me that. Not another word! Come, select your partners."

Paul had no option. He was paired off with the tall and rather angular young lady mentioned, while Dulcie looked on pouting, and snubbed Tipping, who humbly asked for the pleasure of dancing with her, by declaring that she meant to dance with Tom.

The dance began to a sort of rhythmical accompaniment by Mr. Burdekin, who intoned "Tops advance, retire and cross. Balance at corners. (Very nice, Miss Grimstone!) More "_abandon_," Chawner! Lift the feet more from the floor. Not so high as that! Oh, dear me! that last figure over again. And slide the feet, oh, slide the feet! (Bult.i.tude, you"re leaving out all the steps!")

Paul was dragged, unwilling but unresisting, through it all by his partner, who jerked and pushed him into his place without a word, being apparently under strict orders from the governess not on any account to speak to the boys.

After the dance the couples promenaded in a stiff but stately manner round the room to a dirge-like march sc.r.a.ped upon the violin, the boys taking the parts of ladies jibbing away from their partners in a highly unlady-like fashion, and the boy burdened with the companionship of the younger Miss Mutlow walking along in a very agony of bashfulness.

"I suppose," thought Paul, as he led the way with Miss Mary Mutlow, "if d.i.c.k were ever to hear of this, he"d think it _funny_. Oh, if I ever get the upper hand of him again----. How much longer, I wonder, shall I have to play the fool to this infernal fiddle!"

But, if this was bad, worse was to come.

There was another pause, in which Mr. Burdekin said blandly, "I wonder now if we have forgotten our sailor"s hornpipe. Perhaps Bult.i.tude will prove the contrary. If I remember right, he used to perform it with singular correctness. And, let me tell you, there are a great number of spurious hornpipe steps in circulation. Come, sir, oblige me by dancing it alone!"

This was the final straw. It was not to be supposed for one moment that Mr. Bult.i.tude would lower his dignity in such a preposterous manner.

Besides, he did not know how to dance the hornpipe.

So he said, "I shall do nothing of the sort. I"ve had quite enough of this--ah--tomfoolery!"

"That is a very impolite manner of declining, Bult.i.tude; highly discourteous and unpolished. I must insist now--really, as a personal matter--upon your going through the sailor"s hornpipe. Come, you won"t make a scene, I"m sure. You"ll oblige me, as a gentleman?"

"I tell you I can"t!" said Mr. Bult.i.tude sullenly. "I never did such a thing in my life; it would be enough to kill me at my age!"

"This is untrue, sir. Do you mean to say you will not dance the hornpipe?"

"No," said Paul, "I"ll be d.a.m.ned if I do!"

There was unfortunately no possible doubt about the nature of the word used--he said it so very distinctly. The governess screamed and called her charges to her. Dulcie hid her face, and some of the boys t.i.ttered.

Mr. Burdekin turned pink. "After that disgraceful language, sir, in the presence of the fairer s.e.x, I have no more to do with you. You will have the goodness to stand in the centre of that form. Gentlemen, select your partners for the Highland schottische!"

Mr. Bult.i.tude, by no means sorry to be freed from the irksome necessity of dancing with a heart ill-attuned for enjoyment, got up on the form and stood looking, sullenly enough, upon the proceedings. The governess glowered at him now and then as a monster of youthful depravity; the Miss Mutlows glanced up at him as they tripped past, with curiosity not unmixed with admiration, but Dulcie steadily avoided looking in his direction.

Paul was just congratulating himself upon his escape when the door opened wide, and the Doctor marched slowly and imposingly into the room.

He did this occasionally, partly to superintend matters, and partly as an encouraging mark of approbation. He looked round the cla.s.s at first with benignant toleration, until his glance took in the bench upon which Mr. Bult.i.tude was set up. Then his eye slowly travelled up to the level of Paul"s head, his expression changing meanwhile to a petrifying glare.

It was not, as Paul instinctively felt, exactly the position in which a gentleman who wished to stand well with those in authority over him would prefer to be found. He felt his heart turn to water within him, and stared limp and helpless at the Doctor.

There was an awful silence (Dr. Grimstone was addicted to awful silences; and, indeed, if seldom strictly "golden," silence may often be called "iron"), but at last he inquired, "And pray what may you be doing up there, sir?"

"Upon my soul I can"t say," said Mr. Bult.i.tude feebly. "Ask that gentleman there with the fiddle--he knows."

Mr. Burdekin was a good-natured, easy-tempered little man, and had already forgotten the affront to his dignity. He was anxious not to get the boy into more trouble.

"Bult.i.tude was a little inattentive and, I may say, wanting in respect, Dr. Grimstone," he said, putting it as mildly as he could with any accuracy; "so I ventured to place him there as a punishment."

"Quite right, Mr. Burdekin," said the Doctor: "quite right. I am sorry that any boy of mine should have caused you to do so. You are again beginning your career of disorder and rebellion, are you, sir? Go up into the schoolroom at once, and write a dozen copies before tea-time! A very little more eccentricity and insubordination from you, Bult.i.tude, and you will reap a full reward--a full reward, sir!"

So Mr. Bult.i.tude was driven out of the dancing cla.s.s in dire disgrace--which would not have distressed him particularly, being only one more drop in his bitter cup--but that he recognised that now his hopes of approaching the Doctor with his burden of woe were fallen like a card castle. They were fiddled and danced away for at least twenty-four hours--perhaps for ever!

Bitterly did he brood over this as he slowly and laboriously copied out sundry vain repet.i.tions of such axioms as, "Cultivate Habits of Courtesy and Self-control," and "True Happiness is to be sought in Contentment."

He saw the prospect of a tolerably severe flogging growing more and more distinct, and felt that he could not present himself to his family with the consciousness of having suffered such an indelible disgrace. His family! What would become of them in his absence? Would he ever see his comfortable home in Bayswater again?

Tea-time came, and after it evening preparation, when Mr. Tinkler presided in a feeble and ineffective manner, perpetually suspecting that the faint sn.i.g.g.e.rs he heard were indulged in at his own expense, and calling perfectly innocent victims to account for them.

Paul sat next to Jolland and, in his desperate anxiety to avoid further unpleasantness, found himself, as he could not for his life have written a Latin or a German composition, reduced to copy down his neighbour"s exercises. This Jolland (who had looked forward to an arrangement of a very opposite kind) nevertheless cheerfully allowed him to do, though he expressed doubts as to the wisdom of a servile imitation--more, perhaps, from prudence than conscientiousness.

Jolland, in the intervals of study, was deeply engaged in the production of a small ill.u.s.trated work of fiction, which he was pleased to call _The Adventures of Ben Buterkin at Scool_. It was in a great measure an autobiography, and the cuts depicting the hero"s flagellations--which were frequent in the course of the narrative--were executed with much vigour and feeling.

He turned out a great number of these works in the course of the term, as well as faces in pen and ink with moving tongues and rolling eyes, and these he would present to a few favoured friends with a secretive and self-depreciatory giggle.

Amidst scenes and companions like these, Paul sat out the evening hours on his hard seat, which was just at the junction of two forms--an exquisitely uncomfortable position, as all who have tried it will acknowledge--until the time for going to bed came round again. He dreaded the hours of darkness, but there was no help for it--to protest would have been madness just then, and, once more, he was forced to pa.s.s a night under the roof of Crichton House.