Hypothetically if the only choice you are given is to do the wrong it isn"t doing wrong rather fate. But where would you put yourself if you found it amusing? Pleasure and dignity? The line separating these two things becomes blurry. Mutual exclusivity of ecstasy and pain feels like quite a laughable joke then.

It was not just another night"s stand. I could not continue..like this. I fainted...I wasn"t able to resist him.

.

.

.

-(Moans)...aah...mmph...

-...

-Aahh...more...behind..

-...(Heavy breathing)...

-(Moans)...I..love you...Han...

-...

-...

-...
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-(Pants)...I love you Han...

-Thanks. Call the officials if you need..the service again.

-What!? Hey? Han?? Wait! You didn"t say a single word.

-I am just an escort here. I"ve other clients lined up. Sorry but I cannot give you anymore time.

-...So, you"ve been f.u.c.king these wh.o.r.es all day long? I was never enough?? Huh!?

-This is irrelevant. Oh and take care not to faint in front of other guys. We don"t have any policy on theft of private possessions.

-YOU PIECE OF s.h.i.t!!

(Jumps at him!)

**ONE HOUR EARLIER**

SelinaShen

-Hey? Where are you going?

-Out. Some peace and quiet would not be bad from time to time.

-Yeah right. At least tell me which club; that way I can get you back after you get drunk and go r.e.t.a.r.d.

-I"m not(sighs)..it"s just a walk Shen.

-Listen Sel, if you are feeling uneasy about me finding out the phone call thing..

-I will be back by Nine. If you get hungry order something.

-I didn"t mean to put this awkwardness between us. It was your..order to open up about anything. The smallest thing to significantly important.

-...

-Feels like Han is pretty high on the list; don"t you agree? For both the case..and you. I"m anxious about what"s going to happen in the next few hours, Selina.

-...

.

.

21:33

So Jerry was out of duty for tonight. There"s probably going to be a few nights with him not being at the stand. It was a bit strange going into the bar while not being greeted by him. But staying at Jane"s side he did make the right decision; after all that happened both of them need some time only for themselves. Shen was right to point it out.

I was being called by Han after coming here. The first call was when I was at Jerry"s house. First it was only statics coming out of the earpiece and then it was his voice on the other side. I can"t precisely recall what he said as I would lose consciousness every time. Pretty pathetic but that doesn"t even begin to explain how complicated I made things, for the case. Shen has always been on the edge. If only I had listened to him when I could. If only I didn"t hide my true self.