Selina JohnsonDays laterBar21:55Saying that getting into s.e.xual intercourse was not a part of tonight"s plan would be a lie. With this in mind why did I get so furious at him? I knew very well that I did not have any rights to claim Han as my own. I never had.
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My effort was pitiful at the most. To latch onto him. To force him. The cases, death of Frank, my promise to meet Violet, I lost track of everything except Han. By the next second I was put down by him.
-(Screams)AAHH!!
-Violence is not the way here. CALM DOWN.
-(Trying to get up)...
-(Helping her)the washroom; here"s towel...cover yourself and then go freshen up. I"ll leave some coffee here.
-(Sarcastic laughter)...I know that feel of care in this voice. What? Can"t sit well with the fact that you have just turned brutal and put hands on your past caretaker..or love?
-Or my current client. I had no choice, had I Miss. Johnson?
-Client..yeah. So it seems.
-...
-...You just left..after that night and now...I"ve been demoted to a "client".
-Promoted.
-Haha(mild laughter)...good one...Han.
-I know.
-...Sorry.
-You are sorry??- There was a strain of unsettling hatred and anger over Han"s face but it got lighter just by the next moment. A question followed "For what?"
-...It"s for...(sighs)I"m worthless, a liar. And..and I don"t have any right to ask anything of you...but..
-Listen. Whatev..
-..Could you ever forgive me Han?
-There"s no need.
-At least hear me out...
-...
-I have pushed you away. Times and times. I left you alone when you needed me. You thought I did not care. At times you lashed out. I took amus.e.m.e.nt in that...I am a terrible human being. (Smiles)another sc.u.m of the earth. Don"t know how to phrase it anymore.
-All of this is pretty exhausting.
-But you know why I did it?
-I don"t and would prefer to keep it that way.
-(Grabs his hand)Do you ever feel like an outcast Han? Throughout these 30 years I"ve been alive the act of being the out of the bunch has become my forte. The fact has sit well with me; please grant me this much...
-(Shoves her away)Night has just begun. Get another guy, preferably a new one. He"ll listen to all of your self loathing. I have to go through these bulls.h.i.ts on a daily basis. Unfortunately for you, the time is up Miss. Johnson.
-BECAUSE I WAS AFRAID. AFRAID OF LOSING THE PERSON I LOVE! YOU!!
-Another run-in with those stereotyping stories. I"m tired of hearing it.
-No! (Crying)..don"t leave..I am terrified Han...stay with me..I have lost so much..everything"s falling apart...
-...Welcome to the simplest world.