Hopes and Fears

Chapter 7

"If asking would do any good, my dear," sighed Honor; "but I don"t think nurse knows. You see, you belong to your uncles now."

"I won"t belong to Uncle Charteris!" cried Lucilla, pa.s.sionately. "I won"t go to Castle Blanch! They were all cross to me; Ratia teased me, and father said it was all their fault I was naughty, and he would never take me there again! Don"t let Uncle Kit go and take me there!" and she clung to her friend, as if the recollection of Uncle Kit"s victory by main force hung about her still.

"I won"t, I won"t, my child, if I can help it; but it will all be as your dear father may have fixed it, and whatever he wishes I know that his little girl will do."

Many a dim hope did Honora revolve, and more than ever did she feel as if a piece of her heart would be taken away, for the orphans fastened themselves upon her, and little Owen stroked her face, and said naughty Uncle Kit should not take them away. She found from the children and nurse that about a year ago, just after the loss of the baby, there had been a most unsuccessful visit at Castle Blanch; father and little ones had been equally miserable there in the separation of the large establishment, and Lucilla had been domineeringly petted by her youngest cousin, Horatia, who chose to regard her as a baby, and coerced her by bodily force, such as was intolerable to so high-spirited a child, who was a little woman at home. She had resisted, and fallen into dire disgrace, and it was almost with horror that she regarded the place and the cousinhood. Nurse appeared to have some private disgust of her own, as well as to have much resented her children"s being convicted of naughtiness, and she spoke strongly in confidence to Honora of the unG.o.dly ways of the whole household, declaring that after the advantages she had enjoyed with her dear master, she could not bear to live there, though she might--yes, she _must_ be with the dear children just at first, and she ventured to express strong wishes for their remaining in their present home, where they had been so much improved.

The captain came alone. He walked in from the inn just before luncheon, with a wearied, sad look about him, as if he had suffered a good deal; he spoke quietly and slowly, and when the children came in, he took them up in his arms and kissed them very tenderly. Lucilla submitted more placably than Honor expected, but the moment they were set down they sprang to their friend, and held by her dress. Then came the meal, which pa.s.sed off with small efforts at making talk, but with nothing memorable except the captain"s exclamation at the end--"Well, that"s the first time I ever dined with you children without a fuss about the meat. Why, Cilly, I hardly know you."



"I think the appet.i.tes are better for the sea air," said Honor, not that she did not think it a great achievement.

"I"m afraid it has been a troublesome charge," said the captain, laying his hand on his niece"s shoulder, which she at once removed, as disavowing his right in her.

"Oh! it has made me so happy," said Honor, hardly trusting her voice; "I don"t know how to yield it up."

Those understanding eyes of Lucilla"s were drinking in each word, but Uncle Kit ruthlessly said--"There, it"s your walking time, children; you go out now."

Honora followed up his words with her orders, and Lucille obeyed, only casting another wistful look, as if she knew her fate hung in the scales.

It was showing tact such as could hardly have been expected from the little impetuous termagant, and was the best pleading for her cause, for her uncle"s first observation was--"A wonder! Six months back, there would have been an explosion!"

"I am glad you think them improved."

"Civilized beings, not plagues. You have been very good to them;" and as she intimated her own pleasure in them, he continued--"It will be better for them at Castle Blanch to have been a little broken in; the change from his indulgence would have been terrible."

"If it were possible to leave them with me, I should be so happy," at length gasped Honora, meeting an inquiring dart from the captain"s eyes, as he only made an interrogative sound as though to give himself time to think, and she proceeded it broken sentences--"If their uncle and aunt did not so very much wish for them--perhaps--I could--"

"Well," said Captain Charteris, apparently so little aided by his thoughts as to see no hope of overcoming his perplexity without expressing it, "the truth is that, though I had not meant to say anything of it, for I think relations should come first, I believe poor Sandbrook would have preferred it." And while her colour deepened, and she locked her trembling fingers together to keep them still, he went on. "Yes! you can"t think how often I called myself a dozen fools for having parted him from his children! Never held up his head again! I could get him to take interest in nothing--every child he saw he was only comparing to one or other of them. After the year turned, and he talked of coming home, he was more cheerful; but strangely enough, for those last days at Hyeres, though he seemed better, his spirits sank unaccountably, and he _would_ talk more of the poor little thing that he lost than of these!

Then he had a letter from you which set him sighing, and wishing they could always have such care! Altogether, I thought to divert him by taking him on that expedition, but-- Well, I"ve been provoked with him many a time, but there was more of the _real thing_ in him than in the rest of us, and I feel as if the best part of our family were gone."

"And this was all? He was too ill to say much afterwards?"

"Couldn"t speak when he rang in the morning! Was gone by that time next day. Now," added the captain, after a silence, "I tell you candidly that my feeling is that the ordinary course is right. I think Charles ought to take the children, and the children ought to be with Charles."

"If you think so," began Honor, with failing hopes.

"At the same time," continued he, "I don"t think they"ll be so happy or so well cared for as by you, and knowing poor Owen"s wishes, I should not feel justified in taking them away, since you are so good as to offer to keep them."

Honor eagerly declared herself much obliged, then thought it sounded ironical.

"Unless," he proceeded, "Charles should strongly feel it his duty to take them home, in which case--"

"Oh, of course I could say nothing."

"Very well, then we"ll leave it to his decision."

So it remained, and in trembling Honora awaited the answer.

It was in her favour that he was appointed to a ship, since he was thus excluded from exercising any supervision over them at Castle Blanch, and shortly after, letters arrived gratefully acceding to her request.

Family arrangements and an intended journey made her proposal doubly welcome, for the present at least, and Mrs. Charteris was full of polite thanks.

Poor little waifs and strays! No one else wanted them, but with her at least they had a haven of refuge, and she loved them the more ardently for their forlorn condition. Her own as they had never before been! and if the tenure were uncertain, she prized it doubly, even though, by a strange fatality, she had never had so much trouble and vexation with them as arose at once on their being made over to her! When all was settled, doubt over, and the routine life begun, Lucilla evidently felt the blank of her vanished hopes, and became fretful and captious, weary of things in general, and without sufficient motive to control her natural taste for the variety of naughtiness! Honor had not undertaken the easiest of tasks, but she neither shrank from her enterprise nor ceased to love the fiery little flighty sprite, the pleasing torment of her life--she loved her only less than that model of childish sweetness, her little Owen.

"Lucy, dear child, don"t take your brother there. Owen dear, come back, don"t you see the mud? you"ll sink in."

"I"m only getting a dear little crab, Sweet Honey," and the four little feet went deeper and deeper into the black mud.

"I can"t have it done! come back, children, I desire, directly."

The boy would have turned, but his sister had hold of his hand. "Owen, there he is! I"ll have him," and as the crab scuttled sidelong after the retreating tide, on plunged the children.

"Lucy, come here!" cried the unfortunate old hen, as her ducklings took to the black amphibious ma.s.s, but not a whit did Lucilla heed. In the ardour of the chase, on she went, unheeding, leaving her brother sticking half way, where having once stopped, he began to find it difficult to withdraw his feet, and fairly screamed to "Sweet Honey" for help. His progress was not beyond what a few long vigorous steps of hers could come up with, but deeply and blackly did she sink, and when she had lifted her truant out of his two holes, the increased weight made her go ankle deep at the first tread, and just at the same moment a loud shriek proclaimed that Lucilla, in hey final a.s.sault on the crab, had fallen flat on a yielding surface, where each effort to rise sank her deeper, and Honora almost was expecting in her distress to see her disappear altogether, ere the treacherous mud would allow her to come to the rescue. But in that instant of utmost need, ere she could set down the little boy, a gentleman, with long-legged strides, had crossed the intervening s.p.a.ce, and was bearing back the young lady from her mud bath. She raised her eyes to thank him. "Humfrey!" she exclaimed.

"Honor! so it was you, was it? I"d no notion of it!" as he placed on her feet the little maiden, encrusted with mud from head to foot, while the rest of the party were all apparently cased in dark buskins of the same.

"Come to see me and my children?" she said. "I am ashamed you should find us under such circ.u.mstances! though I don"t know what would have become of us otherwise. No, Lucy, you are too disobedient for any one to take notice of you yet--you must go straight home, and be cleaned, and not speak to Mr. Charlecote till you are quite good. Little Owen, here he is--he was quite led into it. But how good of you to come, Humfrey: where are you?"

"At the hotel--I had a mind to come and see how you were getting on, and I"d had rather more than usual to do of late, so I thought I would take a holiday."

They walked on talking for some seconds, when presently as the squire"s hand hung down, a little soft one stole into it, and made him exclaim with a start, "I thought it was Ponto"s nose!"

But though very fond of children, he took up his hand, and did not make the slightest response to the sly overture of the small coquette, the effect as Honor well knew of opposition quite as much as of her strong turn for gentlemen. She pouted a little, and then marched on with "don"t care" determination, while Humfrey and Honora began to talk over Hiltonbury affairs, but were soon interrupted by Owen, who, accustomed to all her attention, did not understand her being occupied by any one else.

"Honey, Honeypots," and a pull at her hand when she did not immediately attend, "why don"t the little crabs get black legs like mine?"

"Because they only go where they ought," was the extremely moral reply of the squire. "Little boys aren"t meant to walk in black mud."

"The shrimp boys do go in the mud," shrewdly pleaded Owen, setting Honor off laughing at Humfrey"s discomfited look of diversion.

"It won"t do to generalize," she said, merrily. "Owen must be content to regard crabs and shrimp boys as privileged individuals."

Owen demanded whether when he was big he might be a shrimp boy, and a good deal of fraternization had taken place between him and Mr.

Charlecote before the cottage was reached.

It was a very happy day to Honora; there was a repose and trust to be felt in Humfrey"s company, such as she had not experienced since she had lost her parents, and the home sense of kindred was very precious. Only women whose chief prop is gone, can tell the value of one who is still near enough to disapprove without ceremony.

The anxiety that Honor felt to prove to her cousin that it was not a bit of romantic folly to have a.s.sumed her present charge, was worth more than all the freedom of action in the world. How much she wanted the children to show off to advantage! how desirous she was that he should not think her injudicious! yes, and how eager to see him pleased with their pretty looks!

Lucilla came down cleaned, curled, and pardoned, and certainly a heart must have been much less tender than Humfrey Charlecote"s not to be touched by the aspect of those two little fair waxen-looking beings in the deepest mourning of orphanhood. He was not slow in making advances towards them, but the maiden had been affronted, and chose to be slyly shy and retiring, retreating to the other side of Miss Wells, and there becoming intent upon her story-book, though many a gleam through her eyelashes betrayed furtive glances at the stranger whom Owen was monopolizing. And then she let herself be drawn out, with the drollest mixture of arch demureness and gracious caprice. Honora had never before seen her with a gentleman, and to be courted was evidently as congenial an element to her as to a reigning beauty. She was perfectly irresistible to manhood, and there was no doubt, ere the evening was over, that Humfrey thought her one of the prettiest little girls he had ever seen.

He remained a week at Sandbeach, lodging at the inn, but spending most of his time with Honor. He owned that he had been unwell, and there certainly was a degree of la.s.situde about him, though Honor suspected that his real motive in coming was brotherly kindness and desire to see whether she were suffering much from the death of Owen Sandbrook. Having come, he seemed not to know how to go away. He was too fond of children to become weary of their petty exactions, and they both had a sort of pa.s.sion for him; he built castles for them on the beach, presided over their rides, took them out boating, and made them fabulously happy.

Lucilla had not been so good for weeks, and the least symptom of an outbreak was at once put down by his good-natured "No, no!" The evenings at the cottage with Honora and Miss Wells, music and bright talk, were evidently very refreshing to him, and he put off his departure from day to day, till an inexorable matter of county business forced him off.

Not till the day was imminent, did the cousins quit the easy surface of holiday leisure talk. They had been together to the late evening service, and were walking home, when Honora began abruptly, "Humfrey, I wish you would not object to the children giving me pet names."

"I did not know that I had shown any objection."

"As if you did not impressively say Miss Charlecote on every occasion when you mention me to them."