The Colloquies of Erasmus

Chapter 92

_Mag._ You might prevent that well enough, if you did but lay yourself out, to get as much Wisdom as you can.

_Ant._ I han"t Leisure.

_Mag._ Why so?

_Ant._ Because I han"t Time.

_Mag._ What, not at Leisure to be wise?

_Ant._ No.

_Mag._ Pray what hinders you?

_Ant._ Long Prayers, the Affairs of my Houshold, Hunting, looking after my Horses, attending at Court.

_Mag._ Well, and do you think these Things are better than Wisdom?

_Ant._ Custom has made it so.

_Mag._ Well, but now answer me this one Thing: Suppose G.o.d should grant you this Power, to be able to turn yourself and your Monks into any Sort of Animal that you had a Mind: Would you turn them into Hogs, and yourself into a Horse?

_Ant._ No, by no Means.

_Mag._ By doing so you might prevent any of them from being wiser than yourself?

_Ant._ It is not much Matter to me what Sort of Animals my Monks are, if I am but a Man myself.

_Mag._ Well, and do you look upon him to be a Man that neither has Wisdom, nor desires to have it?

_Ant._ I am wise enough for myself.

_Mag._ And so are Hogs wise enough for themselves.

_Ant._ You seem to be a Sophistress, you argue so smartly.

_Mag._ I won"t tell you what you seem to me to be. But why does this Houshold-Stuff displease you?

_Ant._ Because a Spinning-Wheel is a Woman"s Weapon.

_Mag._ Is it not a Woman"s Business to mind the Affairs of her Family, and to instruct her Children?

_Ant._ Yes, it is.

_Mag._ And do you think so weighty an Office can be executed without Wisdom?

_Ant._ I believe not.

_Mag._ This Wisdom I learn from Books.

_Ant._ I have threescore and two Monks in my Cloister, and you will not see one Book in my Chamber.

_Mag._ The Monks are finely look"d after all this While.

_Ant._ I could dispense with Books; but I can"t bear _Latin_ Books.

_Mag._ Why so?

_Ant._ Because that Tongue is not fit for a Woman.

_Mag._ I want to know the Reason.

_Ant._ Because it contributes nothing towards the Defence of their Chast.i.ty.

_Mag._ Why then do _French_ Books that are stuff"d with the most trifling Novels, contribute to Chast.i.ty?

_Ant._ But there is another Reason.

_Mag._ Let it be what it will, tell me it plainly.

_Ant._ They are more secure from the Priests, if they don"t understand _Latin_.

_Mag._ Nay, there"s the least Danger from that Quarter according to your Way of Working; because you take all the Pains you can not to know any Thing of _Latin_.

_Ant._ The common People are of my Mind, because it is such a rare unusual Thing for a Woman to understand _Latin._

_Mag._ What do you tell me of the common People for, who are the worst Examples in the World that can be follow"d. What have I to do with Custom, that is the Mistress of all evil Practices? We ought to accustom ourselves to the best Things: And by that Means, that which was uncustomary would become habitual, and that which was unpleasant would become pleasant; and that which seemed unbecoming would look graceful.

_Ant._ I hear you.

_Mag._ Is it becoming a _German_ Woman to learn to speak _French_.

_Ant._ Yes it is.

_Mag._ Why is it?

_Ant._ Because then she will be able to converse with those that speak _French_.

_Mag._ And why then is it unbecoming in me to learn _Latin_, that I may be able daily to have Conversation with so many eloquent, learned and wise Authors, and faithful Counsellors?

_Ant._ Books destroy Women"s Brains, who have little enough of themselves.

_Mag._ What Quant.i.ty of Brains you have left I cannot tell: And as for myself, let me have never so little, I had rather spend them in Study, than in Prayers mumbled over without the Heart going along with them, or sitting whole Nights in quaffing off b.u.mpers.

_Ant._ Bookishness makes Folks mad.

_Mag._ And does not the Rattle of your Pot-Companions, your Banterers, and Drolls, make you mad?

_Ant._ No, they pa.s.s the Time away.